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Nott On Your Life by Schmerg_The_Impaler

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Summary: Theodore Nott has had quite his share of adventures, thank you very much. Bravery has never been a Slytherin value. But when he stumbles across a corpse, Theo begins an adventure that includes carnivorous plants, bizarre food items, a disturbingly amorous butcher, lots of blood and gore, plot twists galore, the rhyme I just made, and a little bit of the Grim Reaper thrown in just to spice things up.

I suggest you read at least one of the previous Theo Nott stories ("To Be Or Nott To Be" and "Oh No, Nott Again!") so that this will make more sense to you, but if you don't, that's your funeral. Oh, ha, ha, aren't I just chock-full of puns today?

I am Schmerg_The_Impaler of Hufflepuff House, and this is my submission to Gauntlet Number Seven!
Ratings: 3rd-5th Years [ - ]
Category: Mystery
Characters: None
Warnings: Violence
Challenge:
Serie: None
Chapters: 2 Completed?: No
Wordcount: 12138 Viewcount: 3713
Published on: 11/21/08 Updated On: 12/08/08





1. Chapter 1: As If Things Weren't Weird Enough Already by Schmerg_The_Impaler [ - ] (6431 words)
Many thanks to my beautiful guide, NikkiSue! Dude, it's been too long since my last gauntlet. In case you're curious, my play of "Alice In Wonderland" is a smash success-- I'm the Mad Hatter-- and "Guys and Dolls" is looking up, too.

Some of y'all may recognize Eglantine Mackle from "Long-Distance Extendable Ears." Now you know why Fred was so scared of her!
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2. Chapter 2: And More And More Violent.... by Schmerg_The_Impaler [ - ] (5707 words)
Man, I must have used the word 'blood' at least fifty times...