This is agony, she thought, pure agony. She leaned back in her chair and closed her bloodshot eyes. The most beautiful brown eyes, he used to say. That would be her cue to grin. What, so there are blue eyes out there prettier than mine? she would tease. He would laugh. Well, she would continue, there are certainly green eyes out there more beautiful than mine.
No, Ginny Potter thought, shaking her head, not ‘used to’. Does. He does say. The distraught woman sat in worried silence. She opened her eyes and glanced at her brother and sister-in-law, seeing her sickness reflected in their gaunt faces; a sickness borne of anxiety and lack of sleep. Hermione sat, leaning into Ron, the two on the Potters' couch as he stroked her hair absently, staring blankly into the distance. It had been three days since Harry had gone missing, and none of the three could do anything about it.
Ginny hated the fact that she had to stay there, holed up in the gloomy manor at Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place; an environment that only darkened the moods of the companions. However, with Harry gone missing, the Death Eaters had a full run of the wizarding world”Even more so than in my last school years, thought Ginny bitterly. I never would have thought it was possible”and there was no way any of them could safely venture out into the chaos.
The Order was far too preoccupied with finding Harry to do anything about other things that were happening with the Death Eaters. Someone sent a Patronus their way every week or so, just to “reassure” them that all was going as planned.
If that was so, then why hadn’t they found Harry yet? And if they hadn’t, why couldn’t she help?
As if reading Ginny’s thoughts, Hermione looked at her. “Ginny, you know why you can’t help, don’t you?” she asked.
Ginny sighed. She did know. There were too many reasons. She couldn’t venture out in hopes of finding the Order; it would be damn near impossible. And they couldn’t come here; the place was being watched day and night”another reason that she couldn’t go out to do anything.
Ginny thought back to a night in her sixth year of schooling. Everything could have ended then....
“Give me Harry Potter, and none shall be harmed. Give me Harry Potter, and I shall leave the school untouched. Give me Harry Potter, and you will be rewarded. You have until midnight.”*
Voldemort’s cold voice rang in ears, and Ginny stood petrified. She knew Harry would do it; he would never risk everyone else’s lives on his account. Her head spun as she stood rooted to the spot, terrified that she was going to lose the one person in the world who was dearest to her.
“Come on, Ginny,” whispered a voice at the back of her head. “He doesn’t love you because you’re a worrywart. You’re a woman of action! Come on, pull yourself together and go save him!”
“Yeah,” Ginny thought. “Yeah!” she said aloud, looking around, but no one had heard her. They had spotted Harry.
“But he’s there! Potter’s there! Someone grab him!”* Ginny whirled around, blazing mad, and the only thing that stopped her from grabbing Pansy Parkinson’s throat and strangling her was the fact that Harry was leaving the room.
She wriggled her way through the crowd, trying to reach Professor McGonagall, with whom she had seen Harry last.
“Professor!” she gasped. “Did you see”which way”Harry”went?”
Professor McGonagall looked at her sharply. “Miss Weasley, I suggest you leave immediately! Where were you when your house was evacuated?!”
Ginny swelled with indignation. “My brother is fighting with his best mate,” she hissed, “who also happens to be the man I love. If you think you’re going to keep me from fighting alongside them, you have another think coming!”
The professor looked her up and down appraisingly and sighed. “If you’re anything like your other siblings, I have no chance of stopping you.” Ginny, in spite of herself, was surprised.
“So where is he?” she asked quickly, getting over her disbelief.
“I haven’t a clue where Potter went. All I know is that he’s looking for something in the castle.” Professor McGonagall looked sternly down her nose at Ginny. “Ginerva Molly Weasley, I expect you to be extremely careful and not to do anything foolish.” But Ginny was already taking off at a run in the direction Professor McGonagall had pointed in. “Like get yourself killed!” she yelled after the retreating form.
Ginny had found Harry. He was in the Room of Requirement when she did. He had told her to stay there. She said like hell she would; she was making sure he didn’t do anything stupid, like give himself up.
“It wouldn’t be stupid, Ginny,” he told her. “It would be the right thing to do.”
She laughed mirthlessly, then looked up at him with tears in her eyes. “It would be the right thing?” she whispered. “To tear apart the lives of the ones you love so thoroughly that they’ll wish they would’ve been killed, too? Instead?” He looked down at her and he seemed hesitant.
“Gin”” he started.
“Harry, there’s still time,” she said, laying a hand on his arm. “Work on evacuating everyone. Make so that everyone can live.”
Harry looked into her eyes. She looked back with all of her heart going into it, pleading him to spare himself. “OK, Ginny,” he said quietly. “Let’s get everyone out of here.”
They barely did it. Hogwarts was destroyed that night, but no one was there when it happened, and less than half of their number was destroyed (the escape attempts had been dangerous). Some critical people were lost, but Harry survived. Her Harry.
He told her about the Horcruxes after that. How he and Dumbledore had destroyed the diary, the locket, the cup and the ring, but how there were still three others out there”he suspected. There could be less, there could be more.
“I’m hoping for less,” he said with a laugh. “But no matter what, I’ll keep hunting.”
“I know you will,” Ginny had replied firmly. “and so will I.”
Harry glanced at her, startled. “Um...Ginny, honey...is that really such a good idea?” he asked nervously.
She looked at him. “Why not?” she asked. Her face hardened. “It’s because I’m girl, isn’t it?”
Harry looked completely taken aback. “Ginny!” he cried. “You can’t seriously think that’s what this is about?!” He cupped her face in his hands. “Ginny. If this was about gender, would I have let Hermione help me before?”
Ginny crumpled. “I know,” she said. “It’s just, that’s what it’s been about my whole life, and I was upset....”
“It’s OK,” said Harry, hugging her. “But Ginny, you’re my most precious possession. I””
“Oh, so I’m a possession now, huh?” She grinned.
“Yup.” Harry grinned back. “Mine and mine only.” Then his face softened. “But really, Ginny, I would never be strong enough to lose you. And”and even if you’re not helping me”I can’t be with you.”
“Oh, no, not this again.” Ginny rocked back on her heels. “Harry, I can take care of myself! Please, if I can’t help you live...at least let me help you live a full life?” She looked up at him longingly. “I love you, Harry. I don’t want to lose you again and again.”
Harry looked right back at her. “I love you, too, Ginny.” He drew her in and held her tight. She clung back. “I love you, too.”
He hadn’t left her. But now, her mind whirled, it seemed he had. Forever. And there was nothing she could do to know...to help, if she could. In Ron’s words: “Show your face once and commit suicide. They’re one and the same.”
Not that Ginny didn't want to go searching for her husband. She would have risked life and limb for Harry, but her older brother”far too overprotective, in her opinion (she was twenty-one now, after all!)”would not let her come within any close quarters of the door. To ensure that she wouldn't sneak out, the git had asked Hermione to cast enchantments around the exits.
Her first attempt at escaping had failed miserably.
“What did you do that for?!” Ginny had hissed, her eyes blazing with fury.
“I'm sorry, Ginny,” Hermione pleaded, “but please, I really do think Ron's right, you mustn't go out there! You'll die before you can reach Harry, there's no question about it!”
Ginny glared at her. “Well, at least I can say I tried,” she replied defiantly. She turned her back to her friend and crossed her arms over her chest, tears burning her eyes.
Hermione rested a hand on Ginny's shoulder. “Harry would never want that,” she said gently. “He'll be back, Ginny, I promise.”
“That promise isn't yours to make,” Ginny replied as her voice cracked. She fled up the stairs to her bedroom, throwing herself upon the bed and sobbing hysterically.
Now, after being retrieved by Hermione, whom had long been forgiven, Ginny sat in a large armchair in her living room. Not just her living room, but Harry's.
Harry.... Her thoughts turned to the day he left.
“Be careful, Harry,” Ginny said worriedly.
“Ginny, it’s just a lead. We’re checking it out, and I promise I'll be back soon,” Harry replied, pushing back a strand of Ginny's brilliant red hair. “No later than dinnertime.”
Feeling a little better, Ginny smiled up at him. “You better be back,” she teased. “I'll assume the worst if you don't and start hunting for another husband.”
Harry laughed and kissed the top of her head. “I'll see you for dinner. Can you make something good?”
Ginny grinned. “I always do.”
Harry shook is head. “Ever modest,” he said with a smile. He pulled on his robe and walked out the door, blowing her a kiss as it closed.
Ginny's eyes filled up with tears at this memory. She burst out sobbing, and Hermione's head jerked up, startled at the sound.
“Oh, Ginny!” she cried, running over to comfort her friend. “He'll be back soon, he will, really!”
Ginny looked up, a startled expression on her face, as if she was surprised to find that she was crying. She swallowed hard and quickly wiped the tears from her face, ashamed at this display of weakness.
“I”I can't believe I s-said that t-to him!” she said, her voice still shaking from her outburst. “I n-never meant anything b-by it! Nothing!”
Hermione looked a bit bewildered. “Never meant anything by…what?” she asked gently.
Ginny took a deep breath and looked up. “I”before he left, I-I t-told him that…that if he d-didn't get b-back by d-d-dinner, then...then....” She burst out into a fresh round of tears. “I told him I'd start looking for another husband!” she sobbed.
Hermione looked thunderstruck. “Oh, my poor, poor Ginny,” she said, rocking her back and forth. “Ginny, it's something anyone would say. You were joking with him; he knows you would never do that to him. Never.”
“B-but what if he d-dies and, and that's the l-last thing he remembers m-me saying to h-him?” Ginny sat up, again drying her wet face and hiding her abashment.
“Oh, Ginny,” murmured Hermione. She glanced over at Ron, who was looking worse than ever. If his eyes had bags under them before, they were now positively sunken into his face; his dry lips pulled into a tight line. He looked years older than twenty-two.
“I'll go get some butterbeer,” he said hoarsely, standing stiffly to go to the kitchen. But Hermione shook her head ever so slightly. “Summoning Charm,” she mouthed. She didn't want Ron to leave”for both his sake and hers.
Ron collapsed back onto the couch. “Accio Butterbeer,” he muttered and three bottles came zooming into the drawing room, setting themselves down on the dusty table.
“Ginny, here,” said Hermione, reaching for one of the warm bottles, “you really have to drink something.” Ginny just sat listlessly as she allowed Hermione to hand her a bottle and coax her to drink it. Slight tremors rocked her body every so often as she held back tears.
There was a rustling sound near the window and everyone's heads snapped up. Ron drew his wand and the girls' heads turned curiously towards the clear pane of glass through which a tawny owl was now visible. As Ron was already on his feet, he hurried towards the owl and threw open the window. The owl fluttered in. Ron was startled as Ginny, seemingly out of nowhere, came up and snatched the yellowing scroll of parchment attached to its leg. Fingers scrabbling over the paper to unroll it, she hardly noticed as Hermione joined Ron behind her to read the letter over her shoulder. Her hands shook as the scroll unfurled to reveal a short letter, clearly written with haste. The scrawl was messy and the parchment ripped in places, the ink blotted.
Dearest Ginny, dear Ron and Hermione,
I’ve escaped from my Death Eater captors. I plan to be home within a day. DO NOT SHOW ANYONE THIS LETTER. I’ll tell you everything when I arrive.
Love,
Harry
Ginny turned to Ron and Hermione with wide eyes full of hope.
*page 610, American hardcover edition, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling
Imperius by Aytrianette
Story Notes:
Roxy has given the OK to auto-validate this story because it mysteriously disappeared from the site. Thanks to all mods who help me get my story back up!