“And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am”
Lyrics to “Iris” by Goo Goo Dolls
Disclaimer- I own none of this. It all belongs to J.K. R. Thank you for letting my mind wander…
Chapter 10- Trust
The next two weeks after Harry’s arrival went by quickly. Everyone at the Burrow could be found in a good mood and even Harry was happier than he had been in a long while. Harry, Sarah, Hermione, and Ron were lying in the grass in the backyard looking up at the clouds one day as Harry recalled the events of the past weeks. He had traveled to the Burrow. Ron and Hermione had planned their wedding and set the date in August. Hermione and Sarah had become very good friends. Harry and his friends had taken a trip to St. Mungo’s and a Healer had examined Harry’s arm. He found out that it would take a long time for his arm to heal because he had not seen magical medical attention right away. Harry was just glad to hear that it would eventually heal.
“Look! That cloud looks like a dog. It’s such a lovely day out,” Sarah stated.
“Yeah, it is. I missed days like this when we’re all here, just doing nothing. It’s nice,” replied Harry. He saw Ron and Hermione nod in agreement. They started having a conversation and Sarah decided that she wanted to read for a while. She got up and headed toward the house and upstairs to her suitcase.
On her way back, she glanced out the window and saw that the sky was getting dark. Wondering what was happening, she stepped out onto the front porch to get a better view. The air was getting cooler and the clouds blocked the sun from view. She saw a large dark figure on the horizon and it looked like it was hovering through the trees. Then it was joined by another figure and soon there were three of them.
Sarah stepped a little further away from the house to get a closer look and to try and distinguish what the figures were. They must have seen her because at that moment, they were advancing toward her. Sarah took a step back intending to retreat back to the safety of the house, but her curiosity wouldn’t let her. She decided to call them Shadows. The Shadows wore long, tattered, black cloaks. Their faces could not be seen because their hoods covered the place where their face would be. As the Shadows got closer to her, the air got colder. Then suddenly, they were feet away from her and she decided to run but realized this too late.
The Shadows swooped down and Sarah felt weird sensations running through her body. She felt as if she would never be happy again and that all cheer was being completely drained from her. She felt every hurtful and painful memory come back to her and they were so real. She felt herself collapse to her knees and felt the tears as they ran down her cheeks. Then she felt like she had to fight and so she pushed herself to stand up. Sarah sensed that her energy was draining and as a result, she used what she could spare to scream as loud as she could. Sarah found herself back on her knees and she looked up to see the most hideous sight that she had every seen. The Shadow had lowered its hood and where its eyes and nose should have been was just empty space. She heard a door open behind her and then heard the screeching of a car and the sound of a car’s horn. The world around her disappeared.
* * *
“Sarah…Sarah…Sarah…Can you hear me? It’s Harry; you’re safe now. Please wake up.” Someone held her hand tightly. Sarah couldn’t understand what was happening. The last thing that she remembered was that the Shadows were after her and weakening her. She struggled and thrashed in the bed where she found herself. Hands were restraining her and she calmed herself enough to look up and see Harry standing over her still holding her hand.
“Sarah, it’s alright, calm down. I understand; you’ve been through a terrible ordeal. Please, listen to me. What you faced out there were dementors. They are some of the foulest creatures on this Earth. dementors feed on happiness, leaving their victim cheerless. You have been forced to relive your worst memories. You were very strong, Sarah. You didn’t give up and didn’t give the dementors the chance to defeat you. You’ll want to take it slowly getting up because you’ll probably have a headache. When you’re ready, I’ll give you some chocolate. It really helps, trust me,” explained Harry.
Sarah rubbed her head and tried to remember what she could about the Sha”no, dementors. She had worked so hard to forget the memories that she relived that day, and now it seemed as if all of her efforts were lost. The visions just kept replaying through her mind. Then finally, she cautiously sat up and her head pounded viciously. Harry handed her the chocolate, and, not sure what it would do, she ate it. Moments later, Sarah felt about ten times better. She hugged Harry without a reason and took him by surprise.
“Oh, Harry, I don’t know where to start. It was terrible. I saw things that I had tried so hard to forget, and now, I can’t get them out of my mind,” Sarah sobbed. Harry’s eyes were filled with sorrow.
“I’m so sorry. I never meant to put you in danger. Would you like to talk about it? I’ve just never realized how much I don’t know about your past,” Harry noted. He saw the sadness in Sarah’s eyes and wished that she didn’t have to feel that way. She closed her eyes for a while and then sighed. He could tell that her story was going to be hard to tell and he was ready to comfort her whenever she needed it.
“This happened years ago. I think I was fourteen. You see, there are some things about me that you don’t know. I had a brother. At the time, he was seventeen; his name was Chris. My brother and I were very close because we didn’t really have anyone else left in our family. Bob and Andrea aren’t my real parents, but they were nice enough to care for my brother and me. I don’t remember a lot about my parents because they died when I very young, but Chris knew them. He never told me how they died though, but I only remember asking once. He told me never to talk about it again, so I didn’t.
“Anyway, Bob and Andrea have been very generous and I love them so much. My brother was driving us home from school one day and the strangest thing happened that would change my life forever. We never saw anything, but suddenly, the car was pushed off the road by some force. Investigators could never identify the source. Our car was forced off the road and hit a tree on the driver’s side. The next thing I remember is being out of the car and dragging my brother out too. I brought him away from the car onto the grass nearby and knelt down by him. I remember him telling me some things and how much I meant to him. I told him that everything was going to be okay and told him that I wasn’t hurt too badly because he kept asking me if I was alright.
“Chris looked up at me and smiled. I remember his exact words before he left this world forever. He told me to ‘Keep smiling and to always listen to your heart.’ He also said to ‘Never lose hope in people and remember that though times may be bad, always believe that things happen for a reason. Life is not random; believe that magic can happen. Goodbye, Sarah.’ That day, Chris died, but I always hope that his words will be able to live through me.
“I held my brother in my arms as he died and remember feeling very distant from the world. I didn’t even notice when the paramedics tore me away and brought me to the hospital. After that day, I went through a period of great depression, but then suddenly, I remembered what my brother had told me. I listened to my heart and started the process of living a normal life again.
“Years went by, but I always wondered what he meant by magic, and what the force was that pushed our car off the road. Then, you came along and I understood more than ever. Maybe, I’m more involved with magic than we realize. Maybe, something happened in my family all those years ago that makes my family more involved with your world than I ever knew. Besides, I never knew my parents, so every possibility is open to me right now. My brother never lied to me,” Sarah finished. She was now trying to hide her tears, and was clearly more upset than Harry had ever seen her before. She left Harry speechless. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. It was as if words could not explain how sorry he was feeling. Finally, sound came.
“Sarah…I’m so sorry. I had no idea how much pain you have been through. There I was, feeling sorry for myself and not even realizing your past. You can tell me anything, and if you ever need a shoulder to lean on, I’m always here. Sarah, maybe you and I aren’t that different. I will help you however I can,” Harry stated.
“Thank you so much. I know that I shouldn’t have kept this from you, but at the time, you needed me more than I needed you. I had learned how to deal with my problem and you were still in the process. I’m glad that I was able to finally share this with you. I think that from now on, there shouldn’t be any more secrets, unless we’re not ready to talk about it yet. You must know that I care very much about you. You are the best friend that I never had growing up. After my brother died, I was too scared to let anyone else in. Too scared to become close to anyone else and too scared to tell anyone about things that would show too much about me on the inside. All of my friends knew the Sarah on the outside but none of them knew who I truly was. You’re the first one, Harry, and I couldn’t be any happier that it’s you,” Sarah said. She closed her eyes for a minute and thought about what just happened. To Sarah, it felt as if a weight had finally been lifted after so many years of it pressing down on her.
“I understand now, more than I ever have. Any normal Muggle would never have believed my story in a million years, but you’re not normal. You and I are not so different, Sarah. In fact, we’re more alike than I ever thought possible. It could be that we met to help each other and that’s what I intend to do. We have a great connection, Sarah, and we could perhaps be used toward our advantage. I just don’t know what that is yet. Are you feeling better?” Harry asked.
“I’m feeling so much better. What’s in this chocolate? It works amazingly,” exclaimed Sarah. Harry laughed.
“It’s just regular chocolate, and we use it after dementor attacks because it makes you feel better. I don’t know why it works, but it’s the best tasting medicine that I’ve ever had.” He chuckled. Sarah finished her chocolate and then smiled at Harry. They were both thinking about how lucky they were to know each other.
Life could be hard sometimes, but at this very moment, nothing else mattered. The world stopped as Harry and Sarah looked into each other’s eyes. Harry’s eyes a striking green and Sarah’s were surprisingly two colors: green and brown. Harry couldn’t help but notice because he had never seen anyone with eyes like hers before. They were absolutely beautiful. He smiled brightly and squeezed her hand softly. Now he knew that he never had to face his problems alone again and that there was truly someone else in the world that shared his feelings. Although this wasn’t a good thing by any means, it still relieved Harry to know that Sarah was there to help him and could actually relate to his situation. For both Harry and Sarah, things were starting to look up. Sarah started to stand up and Harry helped her. She leaned on him for support as they left the room together, hand in hand.
Sarah took a seat in the kitchen as Harry conjured up two cups of hot chocolate. They sat and drank for a while as they talked. Hermione and Ron joined them a few minutes later and asked Sarah how she was doing. Sarah told them that she was fine and thanked all of them for helping her. Ron asked Harry why he thought the dementors were here and where they came from.
“I don’t really know, but I have a hunch. I think Malfoy may have sent them. He told me that he had been searching for me for a long time and he is the kind of person who would enlist the dementors to help. I just don’t know why the dementors would listen to a coward like Malfoy.” Harry reasoned.
Then he had another thought. What if Malfoy wasn’t after him, but after Sarah? What if Sarah’s destiny was greater than they all realized? Maybe Malfoy was just covering up for himself when he met Harry at the movie theater. It could not have been a coincidence that Malfoy was in the same country, state, and town as him because Harry had not told anyone where he was going. The only person that knew who he was, was Sarah. The thought that Sarah’s life was in danger bothered Harry and he forced himself to believe that it was himself that the dementors were after. He decided to express his suspicions to Sarah at a later time because Harry did not want to worry her now.
* * *
After finishing their drinks, Harry led Sarah back up to the room she was staying in. He waited for Sarah to fall asleep and then met Ron and Hermione in the kitchen again. They stopped talking when they noticed that Harry had reentered the room.
“How is she?” asked Ron as Harry took his seat at the table.
“Um, she’ll be okay, but she’s still a little shaken up. I don’t think she quite understands what happened to her, and frankly, I don’t blame her. I don’t even understand why the dementors would attack Sarah when they’re supposed to be guarding Azkaban. Am I missing something?” Harry wondered.
“Something’s not right,” Hermione added, “but there isn’t anything in the papers about the dementors leaving Azkaban, but I doubt they would put something like that in the papers anyway. You should see if you can find out anything about this, Ron. If anyone should know, the Aurors should, because someone may be trying to control the Dementors, like Voldemort did. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was Malfoy.”
“You’re right; I’ll see what I can find out tomorrow. Don’t worry, Harry, we’ll figure this out. Besides, we’ve got the old team back together; nothing can stop us now,” reassured Ron.
“Right. Among the three of us, we should be able to stop this from happening again. And anyway, you know that I won’t rest right until we do figure it out. It’ll be just like our days at Hogwarts. Too bad we can’t pull all-nighters reading library books. I really missed that,” joked Harry.
“Yeah, too bad,” joined Ron and even Hermione laughed.
* * *
After inspecting the front and backyard for intruders, Harry went up to his bedroom. He checked on Sarah on his way up and she was still sleeping. He lied down on his bed and shut his eyes as he thought. He thought about the day’s events and their possible meanings and what he had learned about Sarah. He wondered why he had never sensed her story before.
He remembered talking to Ginny while he was passed out and made the connection that he was searching for. Ginny had told him that Sarah was in danger. Sarah’s brother never told her the truth about her parents. It’s possible that Ginny knew more than she let on. Just then a thought came to him that he had never considered before.
Harry rushed out of his bed and down the stairs to where Sarah was sleeping. He regretfully woke her up. She jumped.
It’s alright, it’s me, Harry. I’m sorry, but I just have to ask you a few questions. Do you think you can answer them tonight? I understand that you are tired,” Harry stated.
“Uh, yeah, sure. I’ll try,” answered Sarah.
“Okay, well, first of all, do you know what you last name is? Not Pabden, but the one from your birth parents?” questioned Harry.
“Well, Bob and Andrea told me that it was Stanley. My mother and father were Karen and Christopher Stanley. I don’t remember them that much, but my memories about them are all good,” explained Sarah.
“Do you know if your parents were from the United States?” asked Harry.
“Oh, they were definitely not from America and I wasn’t even born there. In fact, I was born right here, in England. Although I was very young, I remember moving, though because it was very rushed. My parents told my brother and me that we were leaving England because there were too many dangers there. We were gone the next day. We were only in America for about a month when my brother came home from school with the news that Mom and Dad had died. He gave no explanation and, although I did not understand, I didn’t ask any questions at the time. I’ve always wondered if the dangers that they had talked about in England had caught up with us in the States,” Sarah clarified.
Harry thought about what Sarah had said for a few minutes and came to one conclusion: her brother had definitely been hiding things from her.
“Listen, Sarah, I have a concern that I need to share with you. I think that you have a greater connection to the magical world than we realize. Have you ever made anything happen without an explanation? Is it possible that your parents were wizards?”