“A hundred days had made me older
since the last time that I've saw your pretty face
A thousand lies had made me colder and I don’t think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate
They disappear now when I’m dreaming of your face”
Lyrics from “Here Without You” by 3 Doors Down
Chapter 3- Trapped
Disclaimer: I own none of this world. It belongs to J.K. R.. Thank you for letting my mind wander…
He remembered the name of the state, but could not remember the name of the town at all. He hoped that he would not fail. After all, Massachusetts was not that big of a state, how bad could his aim be? He did not think twice about it, he just left. He thought that he would be leaving all of his pain behind. He thought that he would be starting a new life somewhere where no one would find him, where no one would know him. He would take his friends out of danger. Usually, Harry did not believe in running away, but this time was an exception. Without another thought, he was gone, Dissapparating right on the spot.
Harry hit the ground a couple seconds later to find himself alone. This is good, Harry thought, at least no one saw me. He examined his surroundings. He was standing in a fenced-in field shaped sort of like a diamond. Part of it was grass and the other part was dirt. There were four white plate things on the dirt. He had no idea where he was, but he limped on, stowing his wand in his pocket. He still ached so much from his injuries that were not quite healed yet. It was a good thing that it was cold because he still wore his wizard robes. They somewhat looked like a long coat, though.
He walked a little further and found himself in a park. There was a man up ahead. “Had he seen me Apparate?” Harry thought aloud. The man just looked up at him. Harry concluded that he hadn’t seen him before and walked cautiously over to him. The man stood up.
“Er, excuse me, but what state am I in?” Harry asked awkwardly. He knew that it sounded funny, but needed to know where he was.
“You’re not from around here, are you? I can tell from your accent. You are in Massachusetts, son. I’m guessing that it is a long way from your home?” The man looked deeply concerned.
“No, you're right, I am not from here. I am kind of starting over. I’m looking for something, but I don’t know what I’m looking for.” Harry stated.
“Well, in that case, maybe I could help. My name is Bob Pabden, by the way. And if you are looking for work, I run a small inn just down the street. I have been meaning to hire more help anyway. If you decide to take my offer, you could stay at the inn until you find somewhere else. It might take a while to find what you have lost.” He offered.
“Thank you. I think I will.” Harry said quickly. This might be his only opportunity, and he did not want to let it pass.
“Do you have a name? Or am I going to have to say ‘Hey you’ every time I want your attention?” Bob laughed. Harry thought hard on this question. He could not give his real name because someone might find him. He would also have to change his appearance slightly so he would not draw attention to himself.
“Right, sorry, I thought that I had already told you. My name is James Evans. Nice to meet you.” They shook hands. James and Evans were the first two names that came to his mind. Why not choose his father’s name and his mother’s maiden name?
“Great, well, my car is just over there. If you want, I can show you around a bit before we go to the inn and get all of your paperwork filled out. Um, do you have any luggage or anything that you want to pick up?”
“No, I don’t have anything else.” Harry looked up at him, trying not to show his sadness.
“Okay, well, if this is it? I am afraid that I might be judging, but are you running from anyone? Anything?” Bob questioned.
“Just my past. Don’t worry, I am not a criminal, or anything, if that’s what you are thinking. It’s just that I would prefer to leave it behind.” Harry explained as they walked toward the car.
“If you are running from your past, it will catch up with you someday. You do look like you have been through a war. I can see the pain on your face and feel it in your voice.” Bob murmured.
“You have no idea, but I don't wish to discuss it right now.” Harry sighed. He knew that he would have to tell someone eventually and Bob was right. His past would surely catch up with him. It was always catching up with him.
* * *
That night, Harry thought about everything that was happening to him. He realized that he had crossed a line and there was no going back. He had attempted to hide who he was that day. While he was out with Bob, they had stopped by an eye doctor and Harry bought some contact lenses that made his eyes brown instead of brilliant green. Of course, Bob did not understand why he would want to do this, but never questioned him. Harry liked this quality about him. It was as if he actually understood. He also got some new clothes, so he could actually look like a muggle and not draw too much attention to himself. Harry tried to conceal his scar, but, unfortunately, all of his attempts failed. They were not big changes, but at least now, people probably would not recongnize him.
The next day was Harry’s first day of work. He would be working outside cutting firewood for the fireplace inside the inn. He would be working without magic. Harry had sacrificed his magic along with his old life. From now on, he would live like a normal muggle. It would be hard to stay away from magic, but he would try. He still kept his wand on him at all times, but never used it. He had convinced himself that it was just in case he was discovered by anyone who had it in for him.
When he woke up that morning, his room was warm. The sun was shining through the windows and everything was quiet. This is exactly what he wanted. He had never really slept. His dreams were full of Ginny and everyone one else that he had left behind. He knew that he had been talking, even shouting, in his sleep. He just could not escape everything, not yet, at least. Pain had increased over night, he could tell. As he stood up, his body begged him to stop, but he pushed through it as he always did. He had promised that he would work today, and was not going to complain. He would work through the day and earn his stay.
When he went down for breakfast in the small restaurant, he noticed that there were other staff members sitting around a table. He ignored them. Harry was not in the mood for talking or making friends. As he took a seat at the other side of the room with his breakfast, he heard them whispering to each other. Again, he ignored them. By now, he was used to it because of his history at Hogwarts. There was just no escaping.
He looked up and realized that Bob was heading over to him. Now he would have to talk. He could not be rude to his new boss. Bob sat across from him at the table.
“Mornin’ James, mind if I sit with you?” Bob suggested.
“Not at all, Mr. Pabden," Harry answered, unsure that he wanted this. He would have rather been alone, but did not mind his company. The truth was that Harry was not sure what he wanted. If he were alone, he would continue to sulk in his own misery, but if he were not, he would still continue to be miserable. The only exception to the latter was that he would have to try hard not to show it.
“Please, call me Bob. You aren’t like my other employees. You are different. I don’t know why, but I think you and I could get along fine. I don’t exactly see why now, but I’m sure that time will tell us soon enough. If you ever need anything, you know where to find me,” Bob told him and then continued. “You know what? You should come over to my house for dinner tonight. My wife and I were not expecting anyone else, but I could call her now. I am sure that she’ll love to meet you. My daughter will be there, too. She will be home from college for the weekend. What do you say? I can drive you after work, if you want.” This was completely random in Harry’s opinion. He didn’t know what to do. Was it custom for ordinary muggles to accept dinner invites? He did not know. He was not about to make up any more excuses, however.
“I would love to, Bob. It sounds great. I am afraid that if I want to go, though, I have to get to work on cutting those logs. See you later and thank you.” Harry answered him. He stood up and walked toward the door. He was aware of what he was doing. He had done it before. He was denying his feelings. He was bottling himself up inside and he would soon overwork himself. He would soon be working himself to the point of breakdown. He was trapped and could not escape.