A/N: thank you all so much for your reviews!! It really helped, I’ll be sure to look out for punctuation mistakes in this chapter…Oh yes and another thing, Ginny returns to an old memory in this chapter, so if she’s all of a sudden back at Hogwarts, don’t be confused, she’s just in a memory. :)
Disclaimer: you know it all..I didn’t write Harry Potter
Ginny stared, unblinkingly at the potion until her eyes watered. She blinked and looked up at Hermione, who looked surprised, her mouth hanging open.
“Well there you go,” Ginny muttered, turning away to wipe her eyes. “I’m not pregnant.”
“No way, there must be a mistake,” Hermione said firmly, as Ginny turned back to face her. Hermione was holding the bottle closer to her face, so she could see the instructions better in the light. “Are you sure the potion isn’t out of date or something?”
“Hermione, I’m not pregnant,” Ginny gasped, her face shining with tears now. “I’m sorry…I’m not trying to be emotional.”
Hermione pulled Ginny into a soft hug, stroking her hair. “You have every right to be emotional. I’m sorry for you…but don’t take it too seriously yet. The potion could easily be wrong.”
Ginny knew Hermione was only trying to make her feel better, but she nodded anyway. Suddenly there was a loud hammering on the door and they heard Ron’s voice.
“Are you two ladies still in there? Because Mum says pudding’s on the table.”
And they heard his footsteps walk away, until they died out. Hermione pulled away from Ginny and studied her, concernedly.
“You think you’ll be all right?” she asked and Ginny nodded again.
“Yeah, pudding sounds good,” Ginny said as Hermione opened the door. “But you go on and tell them I’ll catch up.”
Hermione looked quizzical, but she walked off anyway, leaving Ginny alone in the bathroom.
Ginny picked up the cup of potion from the side of the sink. It had stopped glowing, it was still ever blue. Ginny studied it carefully before pouring the contents down the sink hole, where she watched the blue liquid swirl round in a whirlpool getting smaller and smaller in it drained away completely.
She sighed, letting the truth sink in. I’ve still got my precious little Lisle. And Harry, she thought to herself as she went to join the others for pudding.
*****
The afternoon passed without much happenings, aside from a Quidditch game in the orchard, Ron, Harry and Fred against George and Bill, who complained because their team only had two people. Lisle flew a long way underneath the on her toy broomstick, begging them to let her play, until Ron and Fred took pity on her and let her ride Harry’s Firebolt (with Ron holding her tightly) ten feet up into the air. Lisle’s eyes sparkled with delight, a ear-to-ear grin of delight on her little face.
Evening came, with another magnificent dinner cooked by Molly (with Fred and George’s ‘help’). They ate outside, on two long tables, now needing more space since the arrival of Charlie and his wife, Evie, and their son Jack, that afternoon. Percy, who had recently only just regained his friendship with Harry and the rest of the Weasleys, came with Penelope and their sons Pete and Michael. The table was now full of chatter and sleepy yawns while Jack, Michael and Pete ran around chasing gnomes, while Coralie and Lisle sat under an old apple tree, tickling Fleur’s cat, Honey.
Ginny looked at the red-streaked orange horizon, watching the trees rustle in the light breeze. Off in the distance she could see the tiny village, several miles away. It was dusky there, but Ginny could make out the odd glow of lights from the houses and passing cars. She focused her attention back to the table where she caught snippets of people’s conversations. Molly and Fleur were arguing politely about Bill’s hair, which still remained long, red and in a ponytail. He sat in between the two ladies, staring into space, his eyes glazed while they babbled on.
“It would be so much nicer short, though,” Molly coaxed Fleur, who shook her head.
“I am thinking it eez better zis way,” she purred in her feminine, French accent, tossing her silvery hair over her shoulder. “Ee is so ‘andsome eet would be a shame to cut it…Eet has taken eem years to grow.”
Fleur kissed her husband on the cheek, but Molly continued to look slightly disgruntled as she finished the last of her custard tart off.
Further down the table, Ginny could see Hermione, Percy and Arthur nearby. Arthur seemed very interested in his chocolate mousse but Percy, however, was in a heated discussion with Hermione about elf-rights.
“Hermione, house-elves aren’t like humans,” he said, his glasses slipping down his nose in agitation, as he wrung his hands. “They want to look after us, it’s their nature to…”
“That’s no reason to exploit them!” Hermione exclaimed, her eyes flashing dangerously. “You do realise they aren’t paid one tiny bit and they don’t get pensions or anything when they get too old to carry on? It’s sick and disgusting how wizards and witches treat them, the Ministry won’t listen either…”
Ginny grinned, and her eyes scanned down the table, finding Harry, Ron and George roaring with laughter at a joke Fred had just told. Ron was red in the face, holding a Firewhisky in his hand, his ears turning scarlet.
Quietly, so nobody noticed, Ginny slipped off without catching anyone’s attention. She went into the nearby field, which was out of view from the table.
At the end of the field was a wooden swing set, with only one swing in it. As children, Ginny remembered how she and Ron constantly fought over it, ending with her punching Ron, giving him a black eye. Since then they had both been banned from it.
Ginny sat in the swing now, swinging in gently with her feet on the ground. She looked over at the sun-streaked sky and a feeling of happiness washed over her as she heard faint laughter coming from the silhouetted table. It was dusk now, she could see the birds flocking into their nests in the high trees. Even the sweet smell of roses and honeysuckle could not erase the constant thought in her head.
I’m not pregnant.
Knowing those words six and a half years ago would have been pure relief and joy for Ginny, but now…she couldn’t stop thinking about it. How excited she’d been at the thought of another pregnancy. She’d wanted more children, of course she did, now she had a family of her own. True, Lisa was a handful sometimes but Ginny loved her more than life in itself…and Harry. There were no words to explain what she felt for him. He’d been there for her through thick and thin. He’d saved her life when she was only eleven. He’d been there for her when Lisle was born. They weren’t even together then, but he'd still made it to see her daughter in the end. And he’d proposed to her. He was like a sparkling stone against the gravel, she loved him in so many different ways and for so many different reasons it was hard to know all of them.
All the memories came tumbling back to Ginny in a rush. Lisle’s birth…her own wedding…Hogwarts and being pregnant with Lisle…
Ginny lost herself in this particular memory, cherishing every little detail, remembering every little fact. She was back at Hogwarts, almost seven years ago…
It was Christmas at Hogwarts, Ginny was standing on the steps in the Entrance Hall with her fellow seventh years. Hermione, Harry, Ron, Fred, George and her parents were coming to stay at Hogwarts for one night and the next day they were all going back to the Burrow together for the rest of the holidays. They had gotten special permission from Professor McGonagall, the new Headmistress since Dumbledore’s death, along with some other parents as well.
Ginny ran her fingers through her hair nervously. She couldn’t wait to see Harry. She hadn’t seen him since the start of term, and all he’d done was wave her goodbye at King’s Cross as she got on the Hogwarts Express.
They had been togethery briefly in the sixth year, but that had ended the same day of Dumbledore’s funeral. He’d told her why he had to fight Voldemort before they could get back together. He was still fighting.
Ginny knew she still loved him. Hadn’t she always? A tiny part of her had always felt something slightly deeper than just a crush for him. She knew he’d thought her silly as a little girl, liking famous Harry Potter, but now she had matured. She knew him for who he was. She was still waiting for him, even though she flirted and sometimes kissed other boys, just to bury the pain inside her heart. She knew he’d come back for her, one day, when it was all over. The other boys were just like a warm-up, they didn’t really mean anything.
The great, oak doors opened and Ginny’s heart fluttered when she saw him, standing out from all the red-heads of her family.
“Ginny darling!” shrieked Molly bounding over to her, the others following suit. Ginny hugged her mum, grinning.
“Hi Mum, Dad,” she said, hugging Arthur. “Hermione,” she hugged the others in turn. “Ron-Fred-George…”
She reached Harry and there was an awkward pause as she held her arms out for a split second but compromised with a handshake.
“Hi Harry,” she said, breathlessly. He looked at her, his green eyes sparkling like emeralds. She wanted to kiss him again, so badly, but she knew she couldn’t. She forced a smile on her face instead. Harry did likewise, but she could tell it was false.
“How’s the Quidditch team?” Harry asked, conversationally. Ginny had been made Quidditch Captain that year.
“It’s ok,” Ginny replied, as the others began discussing what had changed. Ginny was grateful for this; they all knew about the situation between herself and Harry and there were often embarrassing silences when the two met up. “Same old stuff. We’ve got a pretty good team this year. The Creevey brothers are actually all right at Quidditch.”
Harry grinned “Wow, who would’ve guessed? Bet they ask you for your autograph all the time, because of your famous Bat-Bogey hex abilities.”
Ginny blushed. “But the new Seeker is nowhere near as good as you,” she blurted out. “Danielle Smith, fourth-year. She’s always surrounded by millions of giggling girls and she tried to use the Snitch as a mirror once, to reapply her lipstick.”
Harry rolled his eyes. “She sounds worse than that Lavender Brown.”
Ginny nodded. “Well she’s not bad,” she said fairly. “She’s alright when she’s not messing about, but she doesn’t realise it’s a serious game, Quidditch.”
Harry opened his mouth, perhaps to start a long rant about the seriousness of Quidditch, but he was soon cut off by Molly, who stepped forward.
“So Ginny, do show us round,” she said, putting her hand on Ginny’s shoulder. Hermione and Ron tuned into the conversation, casting glances of nostalgia and fondness around the Entrance Hall. “I should hope sometime tomorrow, if we haven’t any time now.”
Ginny nodded again. “Yeah, I can show you lot round the Castle and Grounds after breakfast, unless we split up into groups of two or three.”
Fred and George nodded vigorously at this, cracking grins of glee.
“Yeah, that’s a good idea,” said George, casually. “We know this place like the back of our hands.”
Molly turned to look at them, her eyes narrowed, her mouth a thin line.
“Now you two had better not be up to trouble,” she hissed, sternly.
Fred and George looked mortally offended.
“We’re twenty-one!” Fred shot back, looking incredulous. “What could we possibly get up to?”
“Oh I know you two better than the back of my own hand,” Molly sighed, exasperatedly. “You’ll be selling joke-shop items, or-or blowing up toilets…”
“Oh yeah, that was in our third-year,” Fred said, with a reminiscent smile. “We almost managed it…but then Harry practically got killed saving the Stone, so we decided to only take the toilet seat off.”
Molly opened her mouth to tell Fred how unhygienic and horribly disgusting that was, when a brightly pink water balloon exploded over her head.
Drenched and livid, she looked up. Peeves the Poltergeist was floating a few feet above her head, his arms full of brightly coloured, bulging water balloons. He gave a mad cackle and pelted them all with the balloons, watching them duck and shriek.
“PEEVES!”
Professor McGonagall came skidding forward in the puddle of water now surrounding Peeves’ victims. She looked up at him, her square glasses flashing furiously.
“Peeves, get down at once,” she barked up at the chuckling poltergeist. He obliged, but aimed his last shot at McGonagall, drenching her too. He floated off cackling as McGonagall swore under her breath.
“I’m very sorry,” she said dryly, waving her wand so that hot air shot out of it, drying them all off instantly. “He’s completely uncontrollable sometimes. Anyway, er, welcome back. I hope you have an enjoyable visit. You will be staying in the Gryffindor dormitories, as most people have already gone home for the holidays. But I believe it is time for dinner in the Great Hall.”
Dinner was the usual Hogwarts feast, and it tasted wonderful. Ginny couldn’t get Harry out of her mind though. Even when he passed her the salt and their arms touched, she could feel her insides squirm and her cheeks go warm.
After dinner, they went up into Gryffindor tower. Molly, Hermione, Ron and Arthur all wanted an early night. Harry, Ginny and the twins remained the only ones left in the Common Room until half-past nine, when Fred and George admitted they were tired too, and went up to bed.
Harry and Ginny were the only ones left.
There was a very long silence, while Ginny sat in her favorite old armchair tight by the fireside, her quill poised above her Transfiguration essay for the holidays. She briefly looked up to see Harry, curled up on one side of the sofa, staring into the fire, his eyes misted behind his glasses.
Ginny didn’t know what to think. Her immediate reaction was to go and kiss him; kiss it better, she had wanted to kiss him for so long now she found it hard to think. Instead she put her quill and walked slowly to the sofa, kneeling before him, a look of genuine concern in her dark brown eyes.
Harry seemed to take a while to come out of his reverie, before he took his glasses off and polished them, awkwardly. Ginny didn’t often see him without his glasses. In her fifth year when they had been going out, she used to take them off and place them on her own nose, and they would both chuckle when they saw her reflection. The bridge of his nose was pink from where the glasses had rubbed.
“I’m sorry Ginny,” he muttered, putting his glasses back on, his eyes now less glazed. Ginny looked into them now, two sparkling emeralds. She wanted him back even more, but she hid her feelings once again. Instead she placed a soft palm on his knee.
“Sorry for what?” she said gently, as he looked at her. She could feel her heart beating in it’s ribcage, pounding for those remarkable eyes.
“I know it’s my fault every time I see you,” he whispered, his eyes growing soft. “I’m the one who’s making you unhappy. I can see it in your eyes, the old flame has been extinguished. I feel like a thousand knives stabbing me all at once would not be big enough a punishment for what I have done to you. I left you Gin, who does that to someone whom they claim to love?”
Ginny felt as though the wounds buried deep inside her had come out into the open. Half of her wanted to cry onto his shoulder the whole night, feel comforted by his touch, but the other half wanted to scream out the pain she had felt that past year she’d been alone, trying desperately to forget him, but she couldn’t. She simply sat staring at him, her brown eyes misting over with tears.
“I never told you before,” he continued, moving closer forward, taking her hand. “I deeply admire you. I love you. I love everything about you, I can’t imagine what things would be like if we didn’t end up together in the end.”
“So why can’t we be together?” Ginny asked, hot tears spilling onto her cheeks. Harry wiped them away, carefully with his index finger.
“You know why, Ginny,” he said, looking at his feet. “I’m so, so sorry. But it has to be this way. I hate myself for making you unhappy, but I have to protect you. If you got killed, I would die inside.”
Ginny looked at him while he turned his gaze back up to meet hers. She could feel his mind working, and he could read hers. Before they could tell whet was happening, they kissed.
Ginny felt her heart leap inside her ribcage. She knew why she couldn’t be with him, for now anyway, but she didn’t care. She cared too much about the moment. Harry kissed her back, but not for long.
“Ginny,” he gasped as he pulled his lips away from hers. “You know why I broke up with you. This can’t happen.”
“You kissed me back,” she whispered, moving forward, her eyes gleaming with tears. “I know you want to kiss me.”
Harry looked at her for a long moment before he grabbed her waist, pulling her up while he kissed her. They were so frantic because it was their only night together until they would be reunited that they forgot the most important thing.
The Contraceptive Charm.
******
“Ginny?”
Ginny snapped out of her reverie, blinking round into her mother’s face. It was dark now, all the stars had come out. She had barely noticed, she was so engrossed in her own memory.
“Hi mum,” Ginny muttered, creaking the swing forward very slowly with her feet. Molly sat down on the nearby wooden outdoors chair, used for watching the children when they had been younger. Everyone had gone in now; raucous laughter could be heard coming from the house.
“You looked preoccupied,” Molly said, looking at the young woman before her now, with flaming red hair and it suddenly hit her how beautiful and grown-up she looked, deep in thought. She felt a sudden surge of pride for raising that grown-up beauty before her.
Ginny sighed. “I was just reflecting over some things. I’m-I’ve just had some bad news.” The words came tumbling out of her mouth before she could stop herself.
“What is it dear?” Molly asked, inquisitively, leaning forward in her chair.
“Well odd things have been happening to me this morning,” Ginny said, brushing a few stray strands of hair out of her face. “I’ve put on weight for sure, and I threw up my breakfast this morning. Harry didn’t really understand, he thinks I’ve got a tummy bug, but I took a Pregnancy Potion this afternoon, to be sure.”
Molly nodded. “Yes, I know what you mean. And?”
“Well, it-it turned out to be negative,” Ginny whispered. “And I really had my hopes up.”
“I know what you’re going through dear,” Molly said, tenderly. “Your father and I went through the same thing before we had Bill. I found out I was pregnant, and we were thrilled. The Healer at St. Mungo’s told us we were going to be having a girl, but then at five and a half months I lost it.”
Ginny felt stunned. “I never knew that. Wow, I could have had a big sister.”
Molly nodded sadly. “Yes, it was quite devastating at first, but then we got past it. Your father and I, because a year later, I got pregnant again, and nine months later we had Bill,” Molly said, smiling. “We were so ecstatic, we were happily married, we had the baby we’d always wanted, we had a lovely house with lots of room for more, what more could we want?”
Ginny felt quite overwhelmed. She knew her parents had always been very close, but she’d never really thought about them as newlyweds with a tiny baby. She felt a sudden gut feeling telling her that things might be different from what she now assumed.
Maybe Hermione is right, she thought, maybe the Potion is wrong.
Molly stood up and kissed her daughter on the forehead and left, smiling to herself. However, Ginny did not get up. Even though it was dark, she stayed there, under the twinkling stars, rocking the swing gently with her feet. She stayed there for what seemed like hours, until she shivered and then yawned. Smiling to herself, she got up and made her way back indoors, the stars still twinkling as she did so.
A/N: thanks for reading! I’ll try update soon again, but please leave a review if you haven’t already, it really does cheer me up!! :) ;)….. I’ll try and make a more interesting plotline, I have a half-formed twist up my sleeve, but bear with me for a while!