A/N: Wow! Another rare Author's note! I just wanted to mention that this is a pretty pivotal chapter to the story, but I'm not sure at all how people are going to take it. Review and let me know!
Chapter Ten: Transformation
That night, Harry was awake after little more than an hour, soaked in sweat and shaking uncontrollably. Tears were running down his face and he frantically leapt out of bed and stumbled out the door. He wanted to run, but made it as far as the common room before tripping over a chair. He threw out his hands, throwing out spells that would seal the room from intrusion and keep sound from escaping, and then screamed out in rage and frustration. He grabbed the chair he had tripped over and picked it up, hurling it across the room. The sound it had made shattering against the wall made him feel slightly better, and he felt around until he had a table to smash as well. Fawkes appeared briefly, let out a squawk of alarm, and disappeared again. Harry continued his rampage until he was exhausted, and then he sank to the floor, breathing heavily, trying to get his emotions under control.
“Harry?” Ginny’s voice shook with fear. “What’s wrong?”
“How did you get in here?” he demanded angrily, after attempting to get to his feet in surprise and falling back down.
“Fawkes woke me up, and he wouldn’t leave me alone until I grabbed his feathers and he brought me here,” she answered, fear still evident in her voice.
The fear in her voice made him feel terrible, and his anger over her intrusion evaporated instantly.
“Please, just leave me alone. I need some time to…” he began, but was interrupted.
“I will not leave you alone! Fawkes thought you needed me, and he was obviously right. What could possibly have happened to make you want to destroy the common room?”
The fear in her voice was gone, replaced by anger that he would try and shut her out.
“I had a dream,” he began, waiting for her to laugh at him for being so upset over a dream.
“And?” she prodded.
“Everyone I care about was in the dream and I couldn’t see their faces. They were all blank, or blurry, and they all accused me of forgetting them. When I woke up, I tried to remember everyone’s faces, and I couldn’t,” he trailed off. “I can’t remember… your face,” he finished with a whisper, hanging his head.
Ginny knelt next to him on the floor, and wrapped her arms around him.
“I’m sorry, Harry, but that doesn’t matter. You know me, my mind and my heart, and that’s all that matters.”
“I know that you love me, and I love you too, but I don’t know if I can bear the thought that I might never be able to look at you again.”
“You have to get used to it, Harry, because the potions might not work, and you have to be able to deal with that. I hope everything gets better, but even if it doesn’t you still have me, whether you can see me or not.”
She could see she wasn’t making much progress comforting him, so she decided to try and occupy him otherwise.
“Come on. Let’s fix this room and work on the Animagus transformation again. I think I felt more of a change the last time I tried, and I want to see if I can do more.”
Ginny then went about the room repairing the furniture, while Harry waited, trying not to feel useless. When they finally sat down on the couch and began to work, he was at first distracted and trying half-heartedly, and he accomplished nothing. Her words had struck him hard, and he was trying to think about what she had said. He had convinced himself that the potions would work, and that it was only a matter of time before he could see again. But he couldn’t live in that false confidence any longer. The dream and her words had taken that away, and he felt a deep sorrow at the loss, and a longing to at least see her at least one last time.
“Harry! You aren’t concentrating at all, and I’m never going to be able to do this without your help,” Ginny yelled, determined to get him to stop moping.
Harry’s mouth tightened, but his face grew determined. She watched him and smiled at the change on his features, happy that she had gotten him to think about something else. Suddenly, Harry changed, and for a very brief moment he became a large black hawk, before changing back to himself. His eyes were wide with shock, and a smile slowly came to his face, while a tear slipped out of his eye.
“Harry, you did it!” she shouted happily, clapping her hands.
“Don’t move, Ginny.”
She was confused, but remained still as he transformed back into the hawk. She couldn’t help but notice how handsome he was, even as a bird. Suddenly, she noticed that the hawk was looking straight at her, and not to the side or past her into space like Harry’s eyes always did.
“You can see!” she whispered in wonder, and the hawk flapped its wings once and bobbed its head.
She reached out and stroked his feathered head, where some of the feathers stuck out in odd angles like Harry’s hair, and then he was Harry again, and kissing her fiercely, while laughing and crying at the same time. She kissed him back with equal ardor, her tears matching his own, while both listened to Fawkes singing triumphantly behind them.
Finally, she pushed him back.
“How did you do it? What was different?”
“I think I finally figured out what I wanted. I wanted to have back some of what being blind had taken from me; not being able to see you and not being able to fly have been the hardest things so far, and I can’t believe how well I can see when I transform. You’re so beautiful, Ginny!”
He leaned in and kissed her again.
“Aren’t you going to try and fly?” she asked finally. “You’ve missed flying, and now you can again.”
“What am I exactly, anyway?” he asked back, “I know I must be some kind of bird. I’m not a crow, am I?” he finished in horror.
“You’re a hawk, a big handsome black one,” she reassured him, “Now how about flying?”
“Do you want to get my broom and come with me?”
“I’d love to!”
Harry unsealed the room, and waited for her to get the broom. She came back quickly and led him over to a window, which he opened with a wave of his hand. She mounted the broom and flew out, turning and hovering out in front of the room. Harry turned back into the hawk and perched on the window sill before spreading his wings out and leaping into the night air. He was filled with exhilaration as he soared out into the night, gliding on currents of air, turning on a wingtip, and then folding his wings and diving. He could hear Ginny whooping with glee behind him as she followed him into the dive. Five feet from the ground he opened his wings again and began gliding, but he couldn’t pull up quite fast enough. Ginny screamed his name as he ploughed into the ground. He turned back into himself and sat there in a daze for a moment, while she ran up to him and frantically ran her hands over him checking to see if he was okay.
“What happened?” she asked finally, convinced he was unhurt, and helping him to his feet.
“This isn’t much like riding a broom,” he grumbled, not quite managing to cover his embarrassment. “It’ll just take some getting used to.”
She laughed at him and re-mounted the broom. “Try and catch me then, bird-boy!” She took off, and he changed back into the hawk and flew after her, letting loose a piercing cry at the challenge. He was no match for the Firebolt in speed, but he could outmaneuver her easily, and they spent an hour chasing each other happily. Finally Harry was feeling exhausted, and remembered guiltily that Ginny wasn’t used to sleeping a few hours every night. He let loose his piercing cry again, and flapped back to the window. Ginny caught on and followed him in. Both were breathing heavily when he turned back to normal and she got off the broom, though both were smiling happily.
“Thanks for being here for me tonight, Ginny,” he told her, wrapping her in his arms. “Thanks to you I can at least see part of the time. I love you.”
“Any time, Harry. I love you too.”
They kissed, and she led him back to his own bed before returning to her own. Harry smiled as he lay back down, thinking that maybe, tonight at least, he would wake up at the same time as everyone else.
*************
The next morning, Harry and Ginny were both bleary eyed and yawning frequently at breakfast, and Ron was eyeing the two of the suspiciously.
“And just what were the two of you doing last night?” he asked, glaring at Ginny, since he knew Harry wouldn’t see the glare anyway.
Harry choked around his large mouthful of food. He had discovered that flying had made him ravenously hungry. They had both decided to keep the Animagus transformation secret until they could both do it, but he couldn’t think of any viable excuses. Before he could clear his mouth, though, Ginny answered for both of them.
“Harry was helping me with some of my homework,” she lied primly, “And I will thank you for not making baseless accusations about our morality.” Ron’s mouth snapped shut, cutting off the baseless accusation that had no doubt been forming.
Hermione laughed at his discomfiture, and kissed him on the cheek.
“I have some lesson plans ready, Harry, if you want to go over them with me. If we work together, we could probably be done with everything until Christmas in a few hours.”
“That would be brilliant! Thanks Hermione.”
Ron and Ginny went to go get their homework so that they could work in the Great Hall as well, while Harry and Hermione began working. By the time they were all finished, lunch was being served. As they ate Professor McGonagall came in and sat down with them.
“This looks excellent, Mr. Potter,” she said as she looked over the lesson plans. “I believe a good deal of this came from you as well, Miss Granger.”
Hermione blushed at the compliment, while McGonagall continued.
“I shall have your class schedule ready before the opening feast, and Moody will have your training schedule prepared by then as well. I’m going to ask you to sit at the staff table with the other teachers at the feast, though for most meals you should be able to sit with your housemates. Mr. Weasley, with Mr. Potter’s permission, I am going to make you the new Gryffindor Quidditch Captain, that is if we can get enough people together for a team.”
Harry grinned as Ron gasped audibly in shock.
“I think that will be acceptable,” Harry said, laughing. “I didn’t think I’d be able to continue on, what with other obligations, and Ron will do a good job.”
Ron nearly fell over himself assuring Professor McGonagall that the Quidditch Cup was as good as theirs, while Hermione hugged him in congratulations.
After McGonagall left, Ron began talking about Quidditch excitedly, demanding to know what position Ginny would be playing, and asking Harry if he knew anyone that would fit the various positions that would be available. Harry was happy for Ron, and found that he wasn’t jealous or disappointed at all. At the very least, he would hopefully have far fewer injuries this year.