It was, in short, a very long summer. I sat on a window seat in my parents’ home in Surrey and read. I took long walks to nowhere. I sat in on wedding planning meetings just to insert comments to confuse all the old women who glared at me for hours on end. Then of course I Apparated to Diagon Alley once a week, moving prone between the shops, up and down the street, my shoes hitting the cobblestones in synchopated rhythm, my heart yearning to remind me of who I realize who I really was when summer ended. Sometimes I wore heels. Knee-high boots that hugged my Muggle jeans. A leather jacket, a long red braid. Blatantly Muggle, stubbornly witch.
Years later, I’d admit that I was asking for some confrontation, my sluggish boredom leaving me reckless and dumb. I wanted to be found by some opponent, so I could fight and win. Earn some Galleons from the Ministry, earn the title of hero. Prove my worth in the eyes of everyone who doubted me because my parents couldn’t cast a spell. Maybe I'd end up a savior of the Wizarding World, a powerful witch with fans and power and no fear. Then, someday, I'd be out fighting Death Eaters, and James would remember how he used to feel, back when I still hated him. He'd remember what it was like to proclaim undying for Lily Evans so the whole world could hear. He'd race to my side right as the end, after all I'd faced solo, seemed near. We'd beat back the enemy as a duo, and I'd be stronger with him at my side.
I was fantasizing about being powerful and loved when I turned the corner by Flourish and Blotts, and reality came crashing back at me. I was just a nerd, James was just a friend, and we had Dumbledore for the heroism.
Three boys stood in front of me, their faces dark with prejudice, anger, confusion, and a regret they tried desperately to mask. Masks. They weren't wearing their usual ones, and that, at least, comforted me.
What destroyed what little I had healed already was the boy on the right, his hair a grease ball, his face sour and despondent, his clothes secondhand and dirty. I imagined his mouth spitting "Mudblood" at my feet, telling me to butt out. I imagined his face watching mine in rapturous admiration, a raw appreciation that seemed to be forever coexisting with hatred for those he saw as opponents. I imagined telling me I was brilliant, telling me that James loved me, to never talk to James because he'd hurt me.
"Sev," I breathed, unprepared for his sudden appearance.
His "friends" saw me before he did. "It's the Mudblood Gryffindork," they spat. Mulciber. Avery. My heart quivered in fear, and I stepped back, struggling to keep my eyes out of Sev's sad ones.
"Evans," I heard him say, and I shook with grief for what I'd lost.
"Snape," I hissed, and I pictured him recoiling in pain for the mess he'd created. I tried to keep walking, past Severus, beyond the history I'd been so adamant to never return to.
Avery's arm shot out. "We have some friends that'd be very interested in meeting you and chatting with you, Evans. Especially as you seem to be lacking your usual . . . entourage. Potter not with you today, is he? Not MacDonald either, I see."
My eyes darted between their faces, flitting most rapidly from Severus' to Avery's. They couldn't hurt me. They were thick - I was quick-reflexed and the best in my class. They were afraid to act without orders. I was perfectly safe. Or was I?
In the moment I hadn't been watching Mulciber, he'd come around me, his hand landing in the center of my back, coming upwards to rest on my shoulder, firm and directing. I screamed, and jerked my arm, nailing him in the gut with my elbow. I stumbled, tripping in the ridiculous boots, watching the adrenaline rush to Mulciber's head, watching the horror of conflict make Severus twitch so only I could see.
Avery's eyes burned, and he moved forward. We were off a side street, and the people that passed kept their eyes on the ground, afraid to step out and endanger themselves or their families.
I pulled my wand from my back pocket, pointing it at each of them in turn, even Mulciber, who moved closer and closer, strength and hatred burning in his eyes.
"LILY!"
I didn't turn, fearful, in a position where I'd moments before imagined being fearless. I didn't swivel my gaze to whoever wanted to save me or hurt me.
Then I felt two people, one on either side, wands pointed at the same people I'd been facing alone moments before.
I saw Avery's face narrow in worry. He hadn't been betting on this.
"What the hell do you think you were doing?" James spat, while Sirius glanced warily at the expression on my face, his handsome features watching my eyes smolder as they connected with Sev's. My former best friend was angry. At whom, I couldn't tell, but I knew it wasn't me.
"Evans here was just agreeing to join my friends and I for a summer afternoon of entertainment. I can't say you were invited specifically like your girlfriend was, but if you hand over your wand and that blasted streak of arrogant stupidity, I'm sure my wonderful boss wouldn't mind you and Black coming along. I mean, for Black, it'd be a family reunion!" Avery chuckled, his hand gripping his wand, his face barely concealing the fear he'd inevitably experienced when James materialized at my side.
Sirius made as though to spring at the Slytherin, but I swung out my arm to hold him back just in time. "No, Black," I hissed aloud, betraying my urgency as our eyes locked.
Sirius turned back to the silly group in front of us, alive with anger and . . . shame? "Those prejudiced pigs aren't my family," he spat. "My home is with the Potters."
From my peripherals, I saw him exchange a wink with James, who winked back. Then they both grabbed an arm and Apparated, dragging me along for the ride.
*****
My head hit something hard, and the world was still spinning. My side felt like it had caved in. I opened my eyes, and immediately James’ arms were around me.
–Lily! What were you doing in Diagon Alley? Haven’t you been reading the Daily Prophet? People are taken off the street daily . . . Merlin, if we hadn’t shown up . . .†His face was haggard. I’d upset him greatly. My heart was heavy with guilt.
–James, I’m fine, see? My knights in shining armor rode in at the last minute,†I told him, lighthearted, winking at Sirius, whose eyes still twinkled, whose mouth still opened wide to reveal all his teeth when he laughed. Who still made jokes at the expense of powerful, dangerous enemies, unafraid of the consequences. War couldn’t change Sirius Black.
–Don’t wink at him, he takes nothing seriously. Lily, please, tell me you won’t go back!†James begged. Why wasn’t I happier? Wasn’t this what I wanted? James hovering over me, anxious to save my life, to be near me, to keep me safe. Why wasn’t I rejoicing?
Distance made the heart grow fonder. I had forgotten how much James pissed me off when we were together. He was the toddler-minded, the prankster. I was the library prone. Everything I’d been imagining for weeks was just that - the stuff of wistful imagination. But I was still marginally pleased to see him - a Hogwarts face, from a world I clung to the edges of during the summer. The romance I’d been picturing was near impossible when we our noses were so close they could have touched. His arms dropped to his sides as I remained silent in concentration.
–Not go back to Diagon Alley?†I asked him, confused by the question.
–Lily, he only means that you won’t go back for . . . you know . . . Snape,†Sirius muttered, and my eyes narrowed.
–I’m not an idiot, Potter,†I hissed at him, suddenly angry. Back to square one, then - overprotectiveness, competitiveness, all around irritation.
–I know, Lily. I’m just saying this is a bit more serious than a Slytherin confrontation in the hallway. Those thugs were going to drag you off to Voldemort. They aren’t just fellow students that serve as pains in the . . . bum . . . anymore.†I raised my eyebrow at the ommitted word, wondering why he avoided cussing now, when foul language had never been a barrier for him in the past.
–Again, I’m not an idiot,†I spat, and, with a small voice at the end I added his name, –James.â€
It was his turn to raise an eyebrow, but I felt his arms around me again. I felt Sirius’ gaze on us, confused, analytical, trying to discern what was happening between us. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and guessed that he’d figure it out before I did.
We all rose, and I finally glanced around me. We were in a field. It was full of shivering grasses, the sun setting in the west, over the plain, ringed by low trees. Some of the trees in the distance were more uniformed, like an orchard. An odd structure, like a lopsided tower, was in the distance. I gave James a look.
–Where are we?†I asked, him, voice low and demanding.
–This is the Weasley house,†he told me. –Arthur’s family. His wife, Molly, has twin brothers, Gideon and Fabian. They’ve been doing some work for Dumbledore, against the Death Eaters. Well, the Death Eaters kinda sorta hate them, so they’ve been lying low here. My parents have also been working with Dumbledore and lying low. So they’ve sent me to talk to the Prewetts in person. Figured it would be less obvious. Our story is that we went to school with Arthur and were coming to hang out with him and his wife.â€
I nodded, trying to process everything. I’d gone from being summer-apathetic to being kidnapped by junior Death Eaters to helping Dumbledore’s agents. This was a weird day.
–You’re being awfully quiet, Sirius,†I said, realizing why the moment seemed suddenly weirder.
–I am, aren’t I?†he told me. –Being awfully unobstrusive and polite. Not cussing or anything. Heck, I’ve even finished my summer homework. Odd, right?†He tossed an arm around my shoulders. –It’s like I’m a completely different person. Why is that?â€
James snorted and started towards the odd building in the distance. –Shove off, Padfoot.â€
Sirius winked at me. Again. –Just doing the lady a favor. Hints never hurt anybody, did they?â€
I half-shut my eyes in confusion and glared at him. What was he implying?
Then Sirius mouthed, He’s back to liking you. A lot. Don’t be a prat this time.
My heart beat quicker, but I focused ahead, not even sure I’d deciphered his lip-syncing correctly. This was a mission for Dumbledore, one I’d been unceremoniously drafted into, before my book list for the seventh year had even arrived. This would be a long last two weeks, I could tell.
As we got closer to the house, I realized it was smaller than I’d imagined it from a distance. It looked like it had originally been a one-story, three-room cottage, but had been added to. Two more rooms had been stacked on top, and leaned precariously. With a jolt, I remembered Arthur Weasley. He’d been a redhead, like me, but quite a few years ahead of us in school. He and another girl, a year lower than him, had left school during his seventh year and gotten married. It been a big subject of gossip. He’d been very ostentatious, being a loud advocate of Muggle Studies and Muggle rights, and being famed for coming from a wealthy pureblood family. He had several siblings, but by the time he married Molly Prewett, he’d been rather estranged from them for his quirkyness.
Gideon and Fabian I’d never met, but they were famous for being James’ and Sirius’ predecessors in mischief-making, though not as extreme.
The path up to the door was neat, lined with flowers and pots. The doorstep was swept and had a bright –Welcome†mat.
James knocked, and a smiling, petite, pregnant young woman with long red hair answered the door. She had dimples and freckles, and smiled wide at the sight of us. –The Potter boy! James, right? And who are your friends?â€
–Lily Evans,†I told her.
–Sirius,†Sirius told her, glancing sideways at us, his eyes begging us not to divulge the last name.
She nodded, her smile dimming only slightly at Sirius’ introduction, her gaze flashing in recognition as we said our names.
–All at Hogwarts, I remember you,†she greeted us. Her grin had bounced back to full brightness.
–We’re here to see your brothers,†James told her. –Las gamelas. The twins. Les jumeaux.â€
She nodded. –That’s right.â€
She stepped aside, giving me a friendly wink as I passed her on the way in.
To the right was a kitchen, to the left a living room. A staircase and a wall divided the two. I saw a grandfather clock ticking away in the corner of the living room, and a huge mantel with a picture of Arthur, Molly, and two redheaded boys.
We passed the staircase right as the two boys from the photo came pounding down the stairs, pushing and shoving each other. They looked fairly close in age, but I couldn’t tell if they were twins.
–This is William and Charles,†Molly introduced us. –My boys. Their baby brother Percy was just put down for his nap, and I’ve got yet another little sibling for them in here. We’re hoping it’s a little girl.†She gave us a dimpled grin, and gestured for her sons to join us.
–I’m Bill and I’m seven!†the taller one told us, coming up and grabbing my hand and shaking it vigorously. Then he showed me what seven looked like on his fingers. –I get to go to Hoggerts in four years but Charlie doesn’t get to go for six and Percy doesn’t get to go for almost eleven! That’s ‘cause I’m the oldest and Auntie Moral says that makes me the most responnible!â€
I laughed at his soliloquy, then stopped abruptly as Charlie started in. Apparently, Charlie was five, but we didn’t get much else, because he was of a quieter sort than his brother.
Molly chased them out the door after Bill launched into a life story, detailing each day in the past week and what he’d done on each of them. Then she called upstairs again, and this time two much older boys came down, both older than us, identical, and redheaded like their sister.
The introductions took place rapidly, and then Gideon and Fabian Prewett, Sirius, James and I sat down at Molly’s kitchen table. She set about preparing an afternoon snack to go with the tea she’d already given us, then bustled back into the family room, saying she needed to send a Floo to her husband, who was at work.
–What message do your parents have for us, James?†Fabian (at least I think it was Fabian) asked. –And why did you bring it?â€
–My parents are being followed, for the same reasons you’re hiding here. It would look mighty suspicious for them to turn up at the Burrow, where your sister lives, there being the connection that could lead the Death Eaters here. So I came,†James explained. –And the message is that Phineas Nott -â€
I saw Gideon’s lips curl in a grimace. –Murderer.â€
–-has vanished from house arrest.â€
Fabian’s face blanched and Gideon’s hand came down on the table. I glanced between them, a thousand questions buzzing in my mind. –Who-â€
James shook his head, and stood. –That was the message. I’ll be going now. Luck be with you.â€
Fabian, still pale, shook James’ hand and nodded. –Thanks for the information, and the warning. Luck be with you, too, and tell your parents we owe them. Again.â€
Sirius trailed me as we left the room and went out the door, onto the lane winding away into the hills. I saw the two little redheaded boys chasing each other into the trees ringing the valley, and then James grabbed my arm and we Apparated, appearing in front of a large manor house shrouded in sunlight and obscured by rose vines and flower bushes.
James’ home.
The Stag and the Doe by grangergirl35
Chapter Endnotes: Review :)