It's a fun idea. Your grammar is a bit offin places, especially the commas. There are some places where sentences should be strung together:
The Healers and crew moved to the next bed. She walked toward him. Her friends followed. He heard her dress ruffling. He closed his eyes tightly for a minute. Opened them and bent down to check the patient.

It would be a lot smoother if you did something like this: "The Healers and crew moved to the next bed, Hermione and her friends following. He could hear her dress rustling. He closed his eyes tightly for a minute, opened them and bent down to check the patient."

There are also some sentences that are really long and slightly confusing:
He had his back to her ,Ronald Weasley, his red hair having been cut short since before he became one of the most famous healers of their time, Neville , who was also a healer was standing next to him, bending over the patient, there were two nurses next to them.

It would clear up a lot if you separated the various ideas that are part of this sentence. For instance: "Ronald Weasley had his back to her, his long hair cut shorter than it had been before he became one of the most famous Healers of their time. Neville, also a Healer, was standing next to him, bending over the patient. There were two nurses next to them." See where I moved the commas? You don't need to put a space between a word and the following punctuation. Check out the Mugglenet FF Help stuff, especially the dialogue section. It's got some great stuff on commas and quote marks and the like.

Your depiction of emotion is pretty good, and your explanation of what happened to get Hermione to this point. I rather like the way it ends, so that you see a lot of back history just in the way Ron reacts.

In short: I like the story; the grammar could use a bit of work; but you've got something worth working at. Don't stop writing!

This is good. A little bit OOC, but not too much. I'd like to see the rest?

Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing!

Cute. And no one figured out what would happen! I like it.

Author's Response: thanks!

"Caught": Let's see... how about this: Harry goes to Hogwarts to visit Ginny and Winky comes in to clean her room when Harry's there and runs home to tell Mrs Weasley. Not likely, but hey, if it makes the next chapter come faster!

Author's Response: hehe....i like that one...i submitted the next chapter a couple days ago so we are all hoping it is accepted soon....

This is good. You've managed to keep it fairly close to the canon characters. Are we gonna get to see more?

I am in awe of your ability to keep all these characters and plots and sub-plots straight. I really enjoy this story and I'm so glad you're working on it again!

Author's Response: Many thanks. Glad you're still reading!

Wow. I wasn't expecting it to go this direction! How exciting!

Tonks stomped her foot. It made distressingly little sound against the cold stone rock beneath her.
I like this. It conveys very well the feeling of being lost in a vast place. Not necessarily open, but much, much bigger than one's self.

Nice touch, Professor "Emrys." The first name of Merlin... [/geeky mythology note]

Good job with the whole ring story. It fits well with what we know of the Founders' personalities and it's got such a convincing backstory. Really cool.

Tonks split her friendship fairly evenly between Charlie and Kevin, Justine and Marianne. In both groups she felt somewhat like a third wheel; they accepted her, but also seemed content in their own company.
Well done. I've been there. Most of us have, I think; you got the feeling perfectly.

This story's gotten more and more interesting as it goes. I like it a lot!

Author's Response: You caught my geeky mythology reference! Yay and huggles! I don\'t know whether or not it has any significance, but it was intentional, so make of that what you will...perhaps my subconscious has plans. Glad I\'m keeping your interest, despite the slow writing process. Thanks!

I’m glad you updated! I have to admit that it took me a while to get into this story, but I do enjoy it very much.

Your opening incident is very…Tonksian. To take a very simple task, such as puncturing a fruit, and explode it? Hee. Charlie’s remark:
“You should go for pink, though — purple makes you look peaky.”
XD

I was fascinated by how suddenly and how smoothly the story went from purple goo to Nanette’s loneliness to her family history.

Tonks started out envying Nanette’s beauty, but it’s now Nanette who envies Tonks’ outgoing, happy nature. As she herself says,
That was the problem, she thought rather bitterly. She did not know how to do anything besides dance.
Poor girl’s been squished into a mold so her bitter aunt can live vicariously through her. What terrible thing to do to a child. This quote really captured it for me:
…white hands against green pod, going sedately about their business as if nothing in the world was wrong. They could have belonged to anyone. They might have been the hands of a doll.
And then you continue to refer to her doll’s hands. It’s a perfect touch – it emphasizes Nanette’s separation from the happy life that her classmates have. An unhappy life is only half living, and she’s feeling the pain of that now.

You switch so effortlessly from voice to voice. We start with Tonks and then slide into Nanette’s voice so well that I didn’t quite realize it had changed until a couple paragraphs in! The transition from Nanette staring at Charlie to Nanette’s inner voice was excellent.

This chapter does the most to advance Nanette’s journey, but you manage to keep the main plot going by sticking Rosier in. She comes in, helps solidify Professor Snith’s character, shows her own irritating sense of superiority, and leaves Tonks arguing about tunnels. Amazing!

I love your Professor Snith. Her name fits her personality perfectly, poor nervous thing. I like how in the end, Nanette sees beyond her twitchiness to the kindness inside. I had forgotten how little we know (well, how little your readers know) about Nanette’s family. I’m so glad she’ll get to find out soon!

And it’s lovely to see Nanette get out of her shell, if only a little. Any friend, even if it’s a teacher, will be good for her.

I’m curious to see the friendship that I’m sure is going to develop between Tonks and Nanette. I can see how they’re learning a little bit about each other and I’m eager to see it come to fruition!

Wonderful chapter – I’ll be back for the rest!

First review, yay! I like this. You're doing a very good job of keeping them in character and it makes sense. Waiting for the rest!

Author's Response: Thanks :-) The story will get going in the next chapter, that was just to set the scene!

I thought this was the best chapter so far. I like your slow growing of the Marauders' friendship. The part about Remus' wand is really unique, nice touch. It showcases each of their personalities in the reactions. Really good.

Author's Response: Thank you, Starmaiden. I’m glad you enjoyed the Marauders’ development. I was hoping it wouldn’t be too rushed as it happens within one chapter. I like growing relationships slowly *winks at some of readers who think romance is growing really slowly!* Glad you like Remus’ wand; I had fun with that. Well, I’ve had fun with it all, really. I hope you continue to enjoy it and thanks for letting me know. I really appreciate it.