Just a normal girl who is in love with writing, painting, photography and all things Potter. I also enjoy Castle, White Collar, anything Disney and, of course, Narnia. It's been around four years since I've been into fanfiction, and I loved every second of it. Now that my A levels are over, I'm back to writing.
Here's a list of my stories. Click on them for the banners:
The Hidden Truth(IN PROGRESS)
Never Let Go(IN PROGRESS and current Priority)
When The Rose Fell (IN PROGRESS)
Albus Potter and the Triwizard Tournament (ABANDONED, BEING REWRITTEN)
Traitors (ON HIATUS)
Ghosts of the Past (COMPLETE)
Patchwork(COMPLETE)
Sapphires(COMPLETE)
Rubies(COMPLETE)
Family First(COMPLETE)
A Touch of Ice (COMPLETE)
Flicker (COMPLETE)
Wisps of Smoke(COMPLETE)
The Dare(COMPLETE)
Stars Don't Determine the Future(COMPLETE)
I'm currently working on a Rose/Scorpius along with Ginny Weasley Potter, and I've got around a million other plot bunnies hopping around for other stories. All I've got to do now is write them down... if I ever get the muse :)
--Nadia
That was really nice! I loved Ginny's characterization, and her thoughts showed just how strong she is. And who'd have thought that it was Ginny who screamed? Brilliant story can't wait for more! Update soon! --Nadia
Author's Response: Thanks very much! I really appreciate your taking the time to review. The next chapter is waiting for validation and should be up very soon!
There's something Lily's been waiting to hear since Harry said his first word.
Written in anticipation for Deathly Hallows, part two.
Nominated for the 2011 Best Dark/Angsty QSQ. Thank you, Maple!
Wow.... this was so sweet and yet so sad! Honestly, my eyes are stinging... I can actually feel Lily's pain, and I just feel like scooping little Harry into my arms and hugging him tight. He's a lot like me here, because I said Papapapa first, and then said mummymummymummy a lot later, hehe :P. Your characterisations were awesome, and the bets between Lily and James were adorable, as was the rugby tackle. And when I reached the part about the door blasting open, my eyes widened with shock. Later on, I felt really sad for Lily when she say Petunia and Vernon treating Harry badly; I know she felt like tearing them apart. Anyway, I think I better end the ranting review, lol. Once again, AWESOME story! --Nadia
Author's Response: Oh, thank you, Nadia! I'm so glad you could relate to this fic. Thank you very much for the lovely review!
Brilliant, Neil!
I proclaim that Mr Weasley is innocent. Draco Malfoy IS a git, despite of being one of my favourite characters. And, as Miss Weasley rightly said, his reputation is not worth a Knut ;).
Anyway, I loved the names for all the legal people. My favourite was Miss Golightly, for some reason. I imagine her to be someone bespectacled ;)and the characterisations were lovely, by the way :)
Overall, awesome story!
--Nadia
Author's Response: Nadia
Thanks for the review.
I'm rather fond of Draco and his family too. They make great villains.
I had a lot of fun naming the legal people, Miss Golightly bears absolutely no resemblance to a barrister I met last year. None at all, honest!
-N-
Neil, this was brilliant! Annie and Albus were so cute, and the opening scene was just awesome. The last bit was very cute, and I'm glad they could all reach the tree house in time ^_^. Harry is such a great dad, by the way! Hurry up and post the next chapter of Strangers at Drakeshaugh, can't wait to read it! And update this soon too! --Nadia
Author's Response: Thanks for the review.
The opening scene, and the final scene in chapter 3 arrived fully formed in my head. The journey between the two has taken some work. as I've sad, this will be three short chapters.Soraya has the next chapter of "Strangers". Chapter 2 of this "Stone and Lough" will soon be ready to go to Ang.
-N-
Neil, this is wonderful! :D I love the wedding plannings. This chapter was lovely, and I did laugh out loud at Luna. I think the dress is really pretty, and I do like the idea of the green-and-white combination :). And Ginny's shoulder injury- due to a bludger, I expect?
I'd leave a larger review, but I've got my Bio A level exam tomorrow, so I'll run, hehe. Once again, awesome story, can't wait to see updates! --Nadia
Author's Response: Thanks Nadia.
Luna is a great character and she can always lighten a story. The dress took me far to long to decide fiigure out. I've had the basic structure of this chapter for weeks. It was always the damn dress which was the problem! I'm glad you liked it. Ginny was, indeed struck by a Bludger.Good luck in Biology.
-N-
As a fan of anything that is Scorose, I was hesitant to read this at first. However, knowing your reputation, I decided to give this a try, and believe me, Carole, I’m glad I did. This was a wonderful, wonderful story. :D
I like the way how the story opens with a light breeze, and Scorpius’s confident thoughts. This is a good opening, as it paves the way for a fresh, new beginning. It relaxes the reader and is an easy read, and I like the absence of overly descriptive words as this feels so much more natural. It automatically hooks me on and makes me want to read more. As his girlfriend arrives, Scorpius’s character is immediately defined. He’s confident, a little snarky, intelligent and as JKR says, an improvement over Draco. He’s recognizably a Malfoy and still different, better, even, and I like the sound of him. Also, his girlfriend calling him ‘Scorpy’ made me laugh.
Lily’s description from Scorpius’s point of view is well done. I especially like these two lines: her red hair glinting in the autumn sun, chomping on an apple. Her mouth slowly turned up at the corners, and she laughed. and, she spun off again, the breeze billowing at her scarlet and gold robes, the sun picking out the myriad of colours in her hair. Lily at first glance seems like a perfect match for Scorpius, and I know I want them to be together even though I’m a ScoRose supporter. I loved the part where Lily threw the core of her apple and Scorpius caught it. It’s almost like healthy rivalry -- we never saw this in the books; it was always the captains trying to crush each other’s hands, so this was a breath of fresh air. I guess it goes to show that the rivalries have toned down a bit since Harry’s time at Hogwarts, and I liked that. The match itself was well written and entertaining to read, and I enjoyed the whole thing. Your writing came across as very natural, and the descriptions were easy to follow and the interactions between the players were certainly amusing. I won’t lie, I was hoping Scorpius would catch the Snitch, but him falling off his broom and Lily visiting him in the hospital works for me as well.
I loved how Albus is portrayed. He sounds a lot like Ginny more than Harry, and this is new. Also, I loved how Lily told Scorpius about how Gryffindors encourage their team members and ended up being yelled at by Albus. His girlfriend is annoying, as I’d expect her to be. I’m glad Scorpius is annoyed with her too, and am wondering why he’s still with her. Maybe we’ll find out later -- and I can’t wait for it, to be honest.
The Quidditch practice part was fun to read, and I wasn’t surprised that Scorpius is now scared of riding a broomstick. I wonder if this fear will go away, or if it’s here to stay. However, I do hope we see him play later on, and that this isn’t for good. Lily and Scorpius’s friendship seems to be developing fast and well, and the parts of the chapter starting from the Christmas holidays went by quickly. The story is fast-paced and your writing is good, and the plot is very intriguing. Initially I thought you were planning to write a story about how Scorpius and Lily got together, but now that’s sorted in the first chapter itself, so I really want to know where this story is going!
The writing style is good. It’s fresh, humorous and interesting to read. There are no awkward sentences of unwanted breaks and the story flows in natural progression. While everyone else makes use of the Potter-Malfoy hatred, I see you haven’t, and that’s a breath of fresh air. I also like your portrayal of the post-war world. My take on it feels so different and it was nice to read what you thought. The characterisations are very well done and both Scorpius and Lily are very engaging characters. I took a liking to them right here.
I would definitely read more of your fic, but I must stop at the first chapter for now. However, I will come by later on and read this fic -- it’s been on my list forever and I’ve been very intrigued. Also, since you have that sequel going right now, I’m eager to read this one.
All in all, the first chapter shows every sign of this being a fantastic story and you’ve got me hooked. I think you’ve got a new concept, and I, for once, don’t mind reading Scorpius with someone other than Rose. I can say that the sequel is going to be interesting too, and I want to get there quick. Anyway, good job on this, Carole! Keep it up!
--Nadia
Author's Response: Thank youuuu.
Okay, let me deal with some things you talked about. I am glad you decided to read this because as a Scily fan, I don;t read Scorose at all. Ha - sorry - I think I just found the ship too late and it had become practically canon, so I needed to write something else. Mind you, I tend not to read other people's Scilys either, although Scugo sometimes appeals.
Why is Scorpius with Ariadne? Um, purely physical - he likes sex and at the beginning of the story, he likes girls with a certain look (which Lily, as a scruffy, apple-chomping girl, clearly doesn;t have).
The romance part of Lily and Scorpius is fast paced to begin with. Originally this was a oneshot. If I'd known I was going to expand it, then I might have paced it differently. However, there are a lot more twists in their relationship so I hope you carry on reading.
Regarding the house issues. This story is all from Scorpius' POV, so you might find the descriptions of the Gryffs not entirely friendly (ha ha - none of them). It isn;t hatred, I must stress that, but there's a riuvaly based on houses, plus for Scorpius - whose family name has this bad reputation - he is straggling to throw off that rep as well as live up to it because he is a Slytherin, and thus has some aspects of his father. I hope you read on because I think you;ll find Scorpius is more like his mother in some regard. You will find that the past comes back into play, but maybe not in the way you initially thought. :)
The sequel is a mystery, by the way, so the romance angle is still there but it's far more to do with Scorpius' life outside Hogwarts and a murder enquiry.
Thank you so much for the review, Nadia, and I'm glad I managed to persuade you read the story. I hope you enjoy the rest of it. ~Carole~
LOL... cant... stop... laughing... XD
Author's Response: Glad you liked it!
Meg, this was a wonderful story. It exudes a sense of nostalgia and sadness, perfectly expressing Petunia’s feelings about Lily. I loved every bit of it.
Petunia, I think, is a very complicated character to write. Balancing her love and her hate for Lily is very hard to achieve, but I believe you did a wonderful job. Every now and then you show how much she misses Lily, but then you make her dismiss it again, forcing herself to believe that she doesn’t care - this, I think, is what Petunia struggles with the most, and it brings out her character really well. All we ever see in the books is the bitterness inside her, and I found your expression of Petunia with a miserable side fantastic. It makes me see that she still had the capability to love and to feel, and that’s the reason she was so upset at being replaced. It is extremely like Petunia to enter Lily’s room carefully, fretting whether anyone saw her, because I believe it took her years to build the façade that she didn’t want anything to do with her sister. I expect she didn’t want anyone to think otherwise. From this line:“This upset her, although she wasn’t certain whyâ€, however, you managed to show that, deep down, she still loves Lily and that she resented being replaced by James.
Petunia didn’t like James at all, as seen in the last couple of paragraphs (especially her glaring at him and her thoughts about his messy hair), and I think that this was one of the main reasons that she never came to their wedding. This was a very good insight into that tiny detail! You took that single line from the Prince’s tale and wove an intricate story around it, and that too from Petunia’s POV, explaining fully why she didn’t go to their wedding. In the books we see that she despised him for being a “freakâ€, but you explained why she actually hated him - for taking her place in Lily’s life. You really managed to show how wounded she was by this, and her behavior towards Lily and her scornful feelings for James really managed to express her true feelings. That was very, very well done.
I noticed the contrast between Lily and Petunia in the part about the planes, where Petunia’s plane was perfectly made and Lily’s one was crumpled and resembled Petunia’s one. I loved the two things it showed us: the first the stark contrast between their habits -- that Petunia was always just perfect and Lily not much so, and also how much Lily looked up to Petunia that she tried to imitate her work. It was ironic that, in the Prince’s Tale, we see the exact opposite (that Petunia was the one trying to follow Lily and go to Hogwarts). I think that is why Petunia grinned: it reminded her how everything used to be before Lily went off to study magic. This insight was fantastic.
Your descriptions were brilliant, and I can actually visualize everything I read. I loved this line: “Petunia wiped the dust off a book’s spine with her finger and stared at the gold embossed titleâ€. Even without closing my eyes I can see this scene as if it were a bit from a movie playing out. Other phrases, such as “messily scrawledâ€, “wiggled the desk drawer openâ€, “bright cotton patches†all have a similar effect: you know what you are supposed to see the moment you set your eyes on the words.
You wrote this story in such a way that, as the end approaches, the reader really feels sympathetic towards Petunia. I can actually feel why she felt so contemptuous, and I can understand why she grew up to be the bitter woman she is. I can understand her hatred for Harry - because Harry is a living reminder of her inability to do magic, as well as James replacing her in Lily’s life. The last line lingered a long time, because she really did try so hard to show that she didn’t care with that assertion. I felt that it was more of a foretelling, and this has a really long and lasting effect… like putting the last piece of a puzzle into place.
I only wished that it could be a bit longer, though. The ending came all too suddenly, when I was starting to really enjoy it. I reached the last line, and I wondered, “Finished already?†I think there is room for this to be expanded in order to give us more insight on what happened afterwards.
Overall, though, this was a fantastic and really poignant piece of work. Well done, SPEW buddy!
--Nadia
This was wonderful, hun! I really liked it! The concept of arranged marriage was very nicely done; since they are quite common in the subcontinent we're both well associated with it, and I think this was as close as it can get. I completely get why Radha Mawshi got a divorcee as a proposal; silly subcontinental customs that the older the girl gets the less chances for her to have a respectable marriage. I'm so mad at Radha Mawshi!
I do like Vineet as a person, though, and he seems lovely. I adored how he accepted Padma though she had "problems". It makes me think that the reason his first marriage fell apart was his wife's fault. I do hope that Padma and Vineet live happily ever after!
This reminds me; It felt so odd reading about kissing between two Indian characters; those Hindi serials definitely brainwashed me, I tell you. X( . In my head it's okay for two Bengali people to kiss, but not Indians; ugh, I must get the serials out of my head and watch more of the recent movies. (I hope you're not offended, because I definitely mean none at all :D)
And Di, the ending really broke my heart. I can't believe Parvati died in the accident. I couldn't tell from the beginning! You wrote it so realistically that it felt Parvati was actually right there. When I read back I did pick up on the little things, though: how Radha Mawshi didn't talk to her and how she remained away from sight hen Vineet and his parents came. I did, however, notice one thing. When their Mum came into Padma's room and Padma was talking about Parvati, you wrote that Meera glanced at Parvati. Did Padma just think that or did Meera look there unknowingly? And Di, when the accident happened was Parvati already married or what that just Padma's mental idea to justify why Parvati wasn't always around?
Overall, Di, this was an excellent fic. I absolutely adore it.
And this was also my longest review so far :P.
*hugs*
Nadia.
Author's Response: Yay! Thanks for reading the fic, Nadia! *huggles*. Well, yes, arranged marriages are very common in the South Asian countries at the very least though nowadays I'd say it's 50-50 here. Arranged marriage is no longer what it was once upon a time. It's starting to become love marriage with prior approval of parents and everyone I know is very open to it these days. :) And Radha Mawshi is stupid. It's sad that the older the girl gets, worse are the chances that she gets a decent proposal. It's not so for men because Vineet got like a perfectly wonderful girl in the end (apart from that little problem, of course).
I loved writing Vineet too! I always thought of him to be this, calm, charming fellow and now that you made that banner with Abhay on it... *sigh*. I'm in love with Vineet, thanks to you. LOL.
Don't pay attention to those serials, hon. They're rubbish. Heh, some two-three years ago, they made it illegal to snog on the streets of Mumbai. Seriously. It's still illegal. If you come to Mumbai, there are there spots where a lot of couples will be sitting and snogging away. It's rather funny. :p Oh and sex before marriage is pretty prevalent here too, though I didn't mention it in the fic. I have a lot of classmates who aren't even virgins. >.< Ooh, and yay, you believed that Parvati was alive. :D I was really hoping no one would notice till the end. When Padma's Mum came into the room and glanced in 'Parvati's' direction only when Padma spoke to 'Parvati'. She realised that Padma thought Parvati was in the room too. That's all. :) And initially when I had planned the fic, I had intended Vineet to be Parvati's widower whose proposal came by-mistake and whom Padma decides to marry to take care of her sisters child and finally falls in love with. But then I decided that it would be better if Parvati died unmarried and Vineet was a divorcee, so that the plot would be less complicated. So yes, Padma's mind just made up the fact that Parvati was married, so she'd have an explanation for why she wasn't always there.
Heh, It's so, so cool that you liked the fic! This is my longest ever response too! :D
*huggles*
This is Eleanor Lupin writing for the Great Hall Cotillion!
This. Was. AWESOME! I loved it! :D :D XD
Author's Response: Yay, thank you! I'm glad you liked it! :D
Now this is what I call good quality humour. :D
Really, Jamie, I would never have believed that this pairing would be able to make such a brilliant story. This is so creative. You've ingeniously managed to put these two together in a romantic humour to make a wacky yet convincing piece of work, even though these two are completely random characters who, as far as I know, never exchanged two words in the books. Not to mention the fact that they are two paintings. It was a very brave attempt and you magnificently pulled it off. Congratulations. =)
Minor characters are hard to flesh out because we know so little about them. The Fat Lady, though, turned out to be a very solid character. Despite of being set in modern times her internal monologue has a touch of oldness to it, and I can feel that she is from a different century from lines like Is it honestly not enough that I must endure that shame? and regaling me with tales of foes. This style of writing could easily have fit into historical era or something like that. I loved her vindictiveness towards Sir Cadogan -- it was very hilarious and I giggled out loud quite often. Poor girl, though; she ultimately did fall in love with him and yet her pride wouldn't let her admit it. I’d always envisioned her as proud and unwavering from the brief glimpses of her we see in the books, and your portrayal of her suddenly brings out that trait. I absolutely loved how she could express her love and chide him both at the same time. Poor Sir Cadogan!
Speaking of him, his dimwittedness made me giggle so hard! The instances of idiocy we see, such as him stumbling over the stone railing or his helmet clanking onto his moustache, are all so funny and uncannily similar to the real Sir Cadogan’s personality. How did you manage to keep him so close to canon? It’s incredible.
The last line had me in hysterics, and I believe that is the perfect place to end this. Those two words sum up all of the Fat Lady’s feelings for Sir Cadogan and her speaking it out loud is the most marvellous ending you could have managed. Another line and the effect would have been totally ruined, for the impact this line has on the readers couldn't be achieved by anything else, in my opinion.
Overall, this is the craziest and yet one of the most amazing stories I've ever read. Good job, Jamie!
--Nadia
------
I'm not JKR. (I don't think JKR would get such a kick out of putting Neville in such horrid situations.) She owns the Potterverse and everything in it.
Title and various chapter names are from the LeeAnn Rimes song Can't Fight the Moonlight.
Once again, this is a Brand New Neville, completely different to every other Neville you've read about from me. And if you're curious about following along, find yourself a moon phase chart from 2007.
Many thanks and delicious baked goods (but not bagels) to the Marvellous Maple for the beta.
---------
I’ve wanted to read this for quite a while now, and I’ve finally managed the time to go through this. I’m glad I did, Jamie, because so far this is wonderful.
I loved how your first chapter started directly with a mission. It sets up the pace directly from the beginning, without unnecessary information about anything else. Your first line itself managed to establish a scene, and we know what to visualise all throughout regarding the weather. It also manages to build up suspense from the start, as the reader starts to wonder what on earth Neville’s doing in such conditions. It makes me want to read the rest of the chapter.
The use of short or medium paragraphs was a good idea, for it stops the story from becoming monotonous or dull. I’m personally not a fan of giant paragraphs, so I’m glad your ones were concise and to the point. The descriptions you’ve added are very vivid and help the reader to imagine what goes on. “Terrifyingly dangerous folly†is an interesting phrase, and it sums up their mission quite nicely! Furthermore, “dull roar†and “low growl†create a very daunting, horror-movie-type scenario that tends to make one more eager to read the story. I also liked your use of “powerful lupine formâ€. It was a very short yet accurate portrayal of a werewolf. Your descriptions, I’d say, is one of the strong points in all of your stories that make me want to read them over and over again, for visualization is an important aspect of a good story.
The plot you’ve started with is really exciting, too. We don’t usually see Neville around werewolves much, and the situation you’ve put them in is rather horrible. Taking out a pack of wolves alone can be quite… perilous, especially for only two Aurors. I felt really bad when Ballinger died -- poor man. I’m glad you didn’t draw out his death long enough, however, because the simple phrase “suddenly very dead body†leaves a much stronger impact on the reader due to its simple blatancy. I did like how Neville worked the rescue out, though. Taking two children at a time was a better idea than trying to lug five of them together. I did like his characterisation as well, for it is completely in sync with the Neville in Deathly Hallows -- trying to save whomever he can. It reminds me of that moment when he refused to cast a Cruciatus curse on the people who got detentions. Poor Neville, he did end up getting bitten in the end :(. I wonder what’s going to happen to him now.
Moving on, I like your introduction of the new Apparition rule: “He couldn't Apparate from within a magically expanded space, not if he wanted to keep all his organs where they were supposed to be.†Frankly, it does make sense, because since the area is physically expanded against the laws of traditional physics, Neville would be having to Apparate to a place with a different space-time continuum. Apparating between two different types of space may be a bad idea. You always have this knack for technicality in your stories, whether it is official documents or science, and this is one thing I enjoy about your writing :).
Now, I wonder why he’s going off to Hermione. This is something I have to see, so I’m off to read the next chapter now. Good job on this one! Can’t wait to see where this goes.
-Nadia
This is really good! i felt so sorry for little Ron. The language used was just perfect for a 3 year old; it was just like I was listening to Ron in my head. It's very clear WHY Ron is so afraid of spiders now. Really good job!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I am so glad you felt like you were listening to 3 year old Ron in your head, that's exactly what I wanted to achieve with this! I am also glad you think it clearly shows why Ron is afraid of spiders now! Thanks so much for reviewing, really appreciate it, glad you enjoyed it :)
Miriam
that's such a pretty name
I'm gonna smile when
you say goodbye...
Narcissa Malfoy is a balanced person. She does not fly off the handle, she does not overreact.
But sometimes things happen. And sometimes people snap.
The song lyrics in this are from Miriam by Norah Jones. Big thank you to Alice/theblacksister, my awesome beta!
Wow wow wow. This was really good! I could totally feel what was going on through Narcissa's head, and I believe this is how a woman would react. The way that desire to kill the girl overpowers her seems so likely. The last few lines were really striking, I could kind of feel the exhilaration that Narcissa felt. I felt really bad for Narcissa in this fic, and though it was not right to kill a person, I understood why she does it.
The way you wrote this story was awesome, you really drew me in. Good job! --Nadia
Author's Response: Thank you! :D I'm glad you liked it! That's good to hear - I was hoping that, while killing isn't right, it would be easy to sympathize with Narcissa, and, if not agree with what she did, at least understand why. Thanks again for reviewing!
Kara, this was really nice :). I felt myself completely drawn into the story by your descriptions. I love how Lucius was characterised; DH proves that he does care about his family, despite whatever he is, and that flows really nicely into your story. I also felt really sad for Lucius and Narcissa; it feels that this might be the reason why Narcissa is always so melancholy. The last part also made me feel like crying; but then again, I also felt slightly mad at Lucius because if he felt that way for Dobby, he could have treated him better.
I do, however, have a nitpick: In the last line, it says, I forget that Harry Potter is a boy of eleven years. Harry is twelve, not eleven, although that might be a mistake on Lucius' part, not yours. But still, as Draco is nearly thirteen, so is Harry; I think Lucius ought to know that as Harry and Draco are in the same year.Other than that, this is a really nice story, you had me hooked :D --Nadia
Author's Response: Oh no, I can't believe that I'm only now getting around to replying to your review! I'm really sorry I left it this long!
First of all, apologies, and thank you so much for the fantastic review! And especially the nitpick. That was of course an error on my part - I know that I pondered it but for some reason put this as Harry's first and not his second year. So it definitely was a mistake on my part! I fixed it now. Thanks again!
I've really grown to like the Malfoys since the end of the book series. Especially in DH, they are so close and there is so much love there... Again, thanks for the review! It does mean a lot, and if you ever leave me another, I swear I won't take so long!
This was really good! :D I loved what each of them saw, but I felt really sad for Remus. I'm glad, though, that he finally got over it. As for Wormtail... I feel it reflected his inner thoughts completely, and maybe this was the catalyst that sped up his conversion to the dark side.
It was a good idea to keep Peter for the last, because we start with optimism and then finally on reaching Peter the mood suddenly changes and leaves a stronger impact. Had Peter been in the middle, there would have been a sudden change in tone midway and that would have been confusing.
I really like how Sirius didn't run and tell all his friends immediately, and that they were only told when they really needed it. It shows that he's maturing up. I also loved that the Map didn't want to accept the Room of Requirement; pretty convincing, indeed! It always seemed rather odd to me that none of them found out the Room of Requirement during their Hogwarts days, so yes, this pretty much solves that mystery.
So yes, once again, awesome job! I couldn't think of a better way to write this story myself. Keep it up!
Nadia.
Author's Response: Thank you so much, Nadia! I really appreciate you stopping to read this and leaving such a nice review. I especially appreciate the comment about leaving Peter for last. You make an excellent point. I didn't even think of moving him, the story always progressed this way--but I really thought having his at the end was such a downer! But it couldn't have gone any other way--like you said, the change in tone would have been jarring. As for the Marauders and the RoR--just because JKR didn't tell us one way or the other doesn't mean they didn't find it. It's not on the map but it could be Unplottable, especially since it's so often different. So who knows--maybe they found it, maybe not. It just worked perfectly for hosting the Mirror here. Thanks again for the review!! ~Gina :)
Aww, this was absolutely adorable.
Aww, thank you so much, Di! *squishes* I squeed when I read the summary. :P
This story was absolutely wonderful. And a Scorose too! I was wondering what had happened between Millie and Scorpius, and I was shocked to find out about their daughter. I felt like crying. It's also really realistic how Millie and Scorpius blamed each other; that's exactly how it happens in cases like this. I read about a story in Reader's Digest where this kid dies after falling under the wheels of the car his dad was driving. The mum blamed the dad for driving over the child and the dad blamed the mum for leaving him outside unattended. It was so sad. I was happy, however, that Scorpius finally found his happiness in Rose. I was also really glad that Rose went along with him to the memorial services. That was really sweet of her.
On a lighter note, the counting part was so funny; I do that all the time!
Anyway, thank you, Di, for that lovely story. That was an awesome present, indeed! *squishes really really tightly.* Wish I could leave a better and more detailed review, but its 12:30am and I need to go to bed or my mum'll have my neck, lol. Thanks again, hun! muah. Love ya!
Author's Response: *squishes back*
I'm so, so happy that you liked this! I purposely wrote you a ScoRose because I know you love the ship. <3 :) Yes, what happened between Scorpius and Millie was terrible and often, married couples get divorced due to the death of a child. They fail to cope with the loss and blame each other. :(
Actually, I enjoyed writing the Rose-Scorpius therapy sessions. I can totally imagine Hermione's kid becoming a therapist and making people speak up. :p :p
Heh, by the time you had left this review I was fast asleep so don't worry about having to go to sleep yourself! :D Love you too! Muah! *squishes tight*
Lori, this was wonderful. I loved every bit of it. You had me hooked through the whole thing, and my eyes were wide with anticipation at some points and I was snorting with laughter in others. Ron sounded so mature, but the little jokes and jibes he made kept him true to his character. I loved how he tucked Hermione's hair behind her ear without realising how intimate it is - typical Ron! I enjoyed how they crashed into the wall too, you had me laughing hard. Hermione seemed rounded and well balanced, and I'm happy you included the little details like how Hermione was worried about flying - these make her sound so real. I always wondered what Hermione would have seen while destroying the cup, and what you've written seemed to answer my question. You've done a great job writing about her insecurities, and I loved how you put in the book.
The writing was so well done that it could be attached seamlessly to the books. If I had written this fic I'm pretty sure I'd have missed out on some points, like the caved in wall, but you didn't and that's awesome. Other than a few errors here and there I felt that it was wonderfully written. This was much, much better than what they'd done in the movies.
I was squealing when I read this line: “Ron,†she whispered. His eyes dropped to her lips, and she lifted her chin to him. I went like, they're gonna kiss! But then that explosion happened and I slumped back against my chair, pouting. Now I think that what you did was great, though. I'm glad Hermione didn't get to kiss him here, though she did try, because now they can do it properly in the middle of a war. lol.
Once again, Lori, this was absolutely brilliant. Keep up the good work! -Nadia
Author's Response: Hey, Nadia! Thanks so much for reading this and leaving such a wonderful, thoughtful review! I'm so glad you felt that Ron and Hermione both were believable and in character and the events of this event not too far beyond the realm of canon. It can be a hard line to walk... keeping to the canon boundaries and still creating an idea original enough to warrant reading.
I'm not J.K. Rowling. I suppose more than a few of you know that.
Edit: Thank you guys so much!! Over 1000 reads on my first story... whoever has read this is amazing.This seems like a rather interesting take on Hermione’s life before Hogwarts. You’ve written her character really well, and I managed to see the image of the older Hermione in this Hermione. When we are first introduced to her in PS it is rather obvious that she’s never had any other friends and she was a bit bossy. I like how this begins from the very first day of primary school. I especially enjoyed reading her interaction with Rob Crawford; he seems like the typical bully! I started disliking him from the very first moment, and was glad to see how Hermione’s accidental magic outwitted him.
This reminds me about her grandmother. I was like “ahh!†when I read about the great-great-uncle; this was a very nice addition to the story, showing us where Hermione got her magical genes from. I do hope that sometime in the future Hermione realizes that this person was actually a wizard. I also noticed how you had Hermione like books about magic and fantasy from the very beginning. It must have been a dream come true for her when she finally got her Hogwarts letter. I grinned at this line: Maybe I like to leave this world and go to another, because she actually did!
Hermione sighed and went to one of the only places where she felt at home - sometimes even more than her own house. I felt rather bad for Hermione here, but this line is such an accurate representation of Hermione’s love for the library. This seems like a strong development of her character for the future, because whenever she feels lonely or needs to consult someone, her first stop is the library. I was glad to see that you put this in here, for this helped to deepen her character.
Now for some nitpicks: While your grammar and everything is really good, you did use a lot of Americanisms. I take it you’re American? Recess is called “lunch break†and “soccer†is football. I’d suggest you get a beta to look over your story for these, because then it’d be so much more realistic. You can contact many brilliant and lovely betas through the Beta Boards.
Once again, this was a brilliant story, and I certainly look forward to the next chapter! I really hope Mariah stays longer, and Hermione at least finds one friend in the Muggle world. Update soon!
--Nadia =)
Author's Response: Nadia,
Thank you so much for your amazing review!! I have always loved Hermione and studied her character a lot. Rob was actually a character I was nervous about writing, so I'm glad he got across that way to you.
I'm glad you recognized the detail about the Great-great uncle, I figured it was possible people might even skip over it. And when I wrote that line, I wasn't even thinking about her adventure to Hogwarts! So ironic!
I always imagined Hermione's parents to be sort of strict and overprotective, which is where she got her love of books. I like to make people feel for my characters, if they can't connect with them.
Yes, I'm American. I didn't write this in the first place for Mugglenet, so I didn't think about it. I'll try and change those as soon as I can.
Yes, I'll update as soon as I can. Last time it took twelve days for this to be validated, so I don't know how long it will be until I get the next chapter up. I have the whole story finished, though. Thanks for your amazing review!!