01/29/07
These were so much easier to write when I was thirteen...dammit. Oh well.
Name: Leah
Age: 16 going on 17
Location: Outside your back door.
Interests: Your life.
Favorite Things: Definately not The Sound of Music. Or Harry Potter, for that matter. Or sarcasm. Though why you would begin to think such things is beyond me.
Hobbies: Not musical theater, and most certainly not reading or writing.
Tired yet? I can keep going all day.
I won't, though, because you need to read some of those little gems down there. You know, the ones with my name next to them.
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The Absurd Fanfic Revolution by Tim the Enchanter
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary:
HEY! Hey you! Psssstttt! You have to help us!
It’s Tim the Enchanter, our fanfiction writer – HE’S GONE MAD! We’re just trying to live normal lives at Hogwarts, but CRAZY things keep happening to us because he’s bored!
Please! Read our story and hear our plight! We need to bludgeon some sanity into our author – Oh no! HE’S AT HIS COMPUTER NOW!
NO! NOOO-aaahhhh! Must resist! Resist… Gibber narg turnip turnip wibble antidisestablishmentarianism blubber gibber wop wop bbluubbaaarrrggghhh!
Nominated for QSQ 2009, Best Humour.
Date: 01/02/09 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 4: Get Hammered and Sickled!
Wow. You do enjoy your detailed weapons/vehicles of war, don't you?
Author's Response:
What gave you that idea, I wonder…? Ha! As you can probably tell, I had enormous fun writing this chapter – I couldn’t resist the opportunity to lightly sprinkle in descriptions of various Soviet tanks and other weapons! Thanks for reading and for the review!
Tim the Enchanter
Date: 01/02/09 Title: Chapter 6: Chapter VI: Happy, Happy Insanity!
I think that was probably the best chapter of mass bloody chaos I've ever read. I espeically like the whole Satan-worshipping thing.
Author's Response:
Who knew mass bloody chaos could be so entertaining? And yes... I couldn’t resist making fun of those ridiculous religious controversies surrounding the Harry Potter series! Harry does witchcraft, which means he worships SATAN! Speaking of which, here’s a hilarious bit of satire on the subject which I found:
http://web.archive.org/web/20000815214418/http://www.theonion.com/onion3625/harry_potter.html
Enjoy! And thanks for the review!
Tim the Enchanter
Date: 01/02/09 Title: Chapter 7: Not An Intermission
Ooh. Exciting. This story really put me in the mood for some nuclear octopi.
Author's Response:
Yes – delicious! A wonderful treat for both of my stomachs! Anyway, the epically absurd conclusion approaches, so check it out whenever it’s approved!
Tim the Enchanter
The Lions of Gryffindor by Equinox Chick
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: It is June 1976 and The Marauders are at the top of their game. From the outside they look to have everything.But appearances, as the saying goes, can be deceptive.
James is discovering that not everything in life is his for the taking. Sirius knows he will have to defy his formidable family. Remus lives in constant fear of his life beyond Hogwarts. As for Peter... Well, Peter is struggling to live up to his friends.
The ties of friendship are strong, but war is raging and with a dark power rising those ties will inevitably fray.
Added to the mix is an adversary called Severus Snape, some lost House Points, a prank or two and a whole lot of Lily.
This is a Marauder tale.
This is a story of what made them special.
This is a story of why it started to go wrong for The Lions of Gryffindor.
OH MY GOOD GODRIC! Lions of Gryffindor won the 2009 QSQ for Best Marauders' Era Story. Amazed and incredibly grateful to those who nominated, judged and have beta'd this fic. THANK YOU.
.·ˆ¯)...(¯ˆ·.
¸.·ˆˆˆ(ºvº)ˆˆˆ·.¸
m m
Trick or Treat!
3. She clicks on her mouse and swipes her wand;
Some stories go up, and some stories are gone.
Stories of her own? Why, she has plenty!
Fewer than one-hundred, but far more than twenty.
Date: 04/21/15 Title: Chapter 23: Chapter 23 -Battlescars
Hi! First, I love your stuff, even though I'm generally too shy to leave reviews. I first read this fic a while ago, and I recently came back to reread it. It's been a while since you've updated it, which makes me think you've probably long since lost interest in this particular tale. I'm sure you've got many other things going on in your life that are more important than writing fics. Still, I hope that you come back to this one someday. It's a great characterization of the Marauder era; and, like your other fics, uses amazing character development and truly difficult-to-solve mystery to keep the reader engaged. I'd love to see where it would go!
Anyway, thank you for all the writing you've done on this site. You're one of my favorite authors, and I wish you all the best!
Regards,
Leah
An Unexpected Twist of Fate by bellaoc
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary: Lily and James Potter knew that their unborn son was marked by a dangerous prophecy. They thought they had prepared for everything. But when their unborn son turns out to be a girl, their world suddenly spins back into their control. Follow along as the Potter's daughter Haven goes off to Hogwarts without the burden of a prophecy.
Date: 01/01/09 Title: Chapter 1: Prologue - Safe Haven
Interesting...I'll admit, the name Haven is sort of odd (no offense meant if that's your/someone you know's name), but the idea is good.
Author's Response: Thanks. Well I've always liked the name Haven, i read it in a book awhile ago, and it does mean "safe place" and it fits. It is an odd name though, i'll give you that! Keep reading!
Neville Longbottom and the Order of the Phoenix by Sonorus
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary:
"It feels as if the whole world is falling apart," said Neville, "and I'm falling right along with it."
In the fifth instalment of the Neville Longbottom saga, Voldemort is back, but nobody wants to know. Facing pressure from all sides, and feeling alone and abandoned, the Boy-Who-Lived confronts the depths of despair and the darkest corners of his soul.
With a direct link to evil plaguing his mind and the cruel Dolores Umbridge determined to break him, can Neville find the hope and strength to carry on? And will he be prepared to embrace his destiny? The darkness falls in Year Five...
A note on the warnings: there's nothing there you won't find in the canon novel.
Date: 03/26/09 Title: Chapter 1: The Shadows on Preston Road
Ooh...good beginning. Very creative. I sort of hoped for a second that maybe Robert and Neville could be friends...he seemed like a nice boy. Too bad. It's interesting to see something so dramatic for Neville through the eyes of someone who doesn't really understand it at all.
Author's Response: That's what I was going for - how a complete outsider would react to the crazy situation Neville's in. Robert can't understand anything, but he can relate to Neville as someone of his own age. In another world, perhaps they could have been friends. (In fact, if you imagine that Robert exists in JK Rowling's universe as well, perhaps they were friends there!)
The Same as a Duck by OliveOil_Med
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary: Luna is always one for being the center of attention, and her classmates are always ones for finding ways for making her such. And when Luna waltzes into Potions class one day with a live duck tucked under her arm, Professor Snape can't help but ask for the reasoning behind it.
A Monty Python-inspired Easter story for Tim the Enchanter
Date: 05/24/09 Title: Chapter 1: The Same as a Duck
I agree. I find that most things become more hilarious when Monty Python is added to the mix. Good story!
Author's Response: Well, Tim seemed to enjoy, which is what my true intentions for writing this were. But, of course, I am happy to see it is loved by so many others as well!
The Torment Bred in the Race by paperrose
Rated: 3rd-5th Years •Summary: It's been twelve years since the Wizarding world saw Harry Potter after he mysteriously disappeared into the Forbidden Forest during the Final Battle in 1998. Now Lord Voldemort has conquered, extending his reach not just over Britain, but France, Germany, and Spain as well.
Meanwhile, hidden deep within the Canadian Rocky Mountains in British Columbia, a terrifying secret is brewing at the magic school that McGonagall herself founded just after the second battle for Hogwarts. It is at this school where Muggle-born Leah Andrews and her best friends, Gwen and Cory, will find themselves thrown into the search for the truth: What is a dead snake doing hung from a tree like a sacrificial lamb? Who really is the new DADA professor with the strange colour-changing eyes and bad mood swings? And just what does a gentle half-giant gamekeeper have to do with any of this?
One thing is for certain - all is definitely not well.
This is the sequel to Alternate Ending. I strongly recommend you read that one first, although I don't think it's necessary.
Excerpt from the Epilogue:
As he sidestepped them, he glanced down again at the wrinkled slip of parchment Charlie had handed him two days earlier with nothing more than a quiet word that there may still be one last loose end to tie.
Date: 06/25/09 Title: Chapter 1: The Journey Begins
This story has great potential. Keep it up!
Author's Response: Thanks!
Justifies the Means by Tim the Enchanter
Rated: 1st-2nd Years •Summary:
Yuri Krum, a high-ranking officer of the Second Zaubererreich, has every reason to be proud of the facility he is creating. But instead of satisfaction, there is doubt, and Chancellor Gellert Grindelwald is the man to answer Yuri’s questions.
The name of the facility is Nurmengard...
This is Tim the Enchanter of Ravenclaw House, writing for The Untold Story Challenge in the Great Hall on the Beta Forums.
Date: 10/18/09 Title: Chapter 1: Justifies the Means
Fabulous. I loved the subtle references to Dumbledore and "work will set you free." Another great Grindelwald piece.