Hello, Thought it was about time I dropped you a review. This is a good mystery story, although I did get a bit confused at first because I was expecting the George to be George Weasley and I couldn't work out why he was a detective. I really should read carefully - ha ha. I liked the plot of this, although I had an inkling that Winston had done it (his surname and the shop did it for me) I couldn't work out how he'd done it - the champagne *slaps head* of course!

Okay, nit pick time. There were a few missing comma's especially after words like 'well' and before 'sir'. Also 'sir' shouldn't be capitalised. I think it is in America, but here it isn't (I had to double check this in HBP where Harry says 'You don't have to call me sir, sir." - ahh, favourite line.)

I loved the beginning of this story. The opening paragraph was wonderfully descriptive and the poor old lady's despair was well written. And the end was great. I loved that Winston just ran.

Well done. ~Carole~

Author's Response: CAROLE! Finally, SOMEONE got the shop name! That was my amazing sly detail of giving it away, you are SO clever! But it is always the Champagne, rookie mistake ;-) Russia using Americanisms? *gasp of eternal horror* /fail I will go and change those >.< Thankyou for pointing those out Caroleeee, I am glad you enjoyed the fic. *hugs* (and well done again on the shop name!) Russia xxxxx

OHHHH! FABULOUS! Terri, I adore this story. Charlie deserves a good time after the kicking he gets in Apparently Asleeep (thanks for the nod by the way - ha ha). I love Antoinette too - she seems so sad and lonely. I hope she likes dragons though, because I can't see Charlie being able to live without them for long.

Favourite line that made me literally LOL was Smooth, Charlie, he thought. First, you knock her down then you touch her in some very inappropriate spots. Yes, smooth as glass.

A lovely fluffy first chapter that has everyone IC and gives us a heartwarming glimpse into Bill and Fleur too. Ohhh, I can't wait to see if Ron is really over his Veela attraction (heh heh). Well done. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks for your review. I'm glad you like this so far. I couldn't not reference AA, and "Carole's" canon. For those who haven't read Apparently Asleep by Equinox Chick, I strongly recommend it. I'm not sure yet what Antoinette likes, but we will see.

That line was originally going to end smooth as silk, but I wasn't sure a wizard who is not only a Weasley but lives with dragons would know about silk. So, it became glass. I'm glad you liked it.

Thanks for the help with names and the encouragement to even write fluffy. Terri

Oh My Word! I love this story. This is a very original idea. I love the fact that James and Lily are 'waking up' in their old house. You eye for detail is superb - the ivy trailing over the house, the rotting toy broomstick. Very atmospheric.

I adored the first chapter. Your James and Lily are very natural with Harry, and it doesn't come over at all forced the way they speak to him, play with him etc. Too often authors don't quite get the baby/parent interraction correct but you pulled that off very well.

I've just seen the next chapter's about Sirius, I so I must go and read his story.

Sorry, not ultra constructive, but it's a lovely story. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks, Carole, I'm glad it came off all right. I was slightly worried about their interactions with Harry; I have no idea how a one year old behaves, so I'm glad it's realistic. Thanks for reviewing.

Okay, I got the hint! Kara, my love, this is wonderful. Obviously, you know I'm a huge Remus/Tonks fan so tend to be picky at other people's interpretations ... but I can't pick at anything here, because I loved it all.

Tonks was so caring, so frightened for Remus - and her inability to think about anything but him whilst others were hurt was just SPOT ON!

Bellatrix was just plain evil, and the fact that she wanted to torture her niece was very IC.

I loved the end, She died thinking of happier times and Bellatrix could not take that away from her (Plus she'll be with Remus very soon).

Well done. ~Carole~

Author's Response: CAROLE! Uuuh.. what hint... *looks around innocently*

Hah, you have no idea how nervous I was about your review, because I know that you are, like, the Remus/Tonks god-authority here, and because I fangirl your writing so much...

So yeah, now I'm really cheery-happy that you actually liked it! Thank you very very much for your review (especially the bit about my characterisation of Tonks)

<3 Kara

Me again. Oh, what an intense chapter. Poor Ron, the feelings he must have been experiencing when Hermione was going through all of that. Wow! I just think you portrayed that superbly. You have a good gift for description and atmosphere, Lori. It's something I'm not good at, so I notice it in others work.

The other thing I wanted to compliment you on was the scene with Bill and Hermione, because I thought that was wonderfully judged. Bill's realisation that Ron isn't a baby, and Hermione trying to reassure Bill that Ron tried his best. It brought a lump to my throat.

Umm, I have a nit pick, and I feel really miserly for saying this because it's such a great story, but I'm not sure Ron would have been able to talk properly if his jaw had been broken. *slinks away as does feel mean for mentioneing it*

Lovely chapter ~Carole~

Author's Response: I love bringing lumps to peoples' throats. ;) Thanks for saying that, Carole. I had not originally intended to include any of that with Bill at all, but it sort of happened, and then he just wouldn't go away... hence, the conversation with Fleur and Hermione as well. Oh my goodness! How do I have 60-some reviews and no one has even caught that before now? I laughed out loud when I read it! You are totally right, and I'm thinking hard what to do. I'm not sure if you read any more, but if you do, you will soon see that I need that broken jaw very badly for about three more chapters... haha! Maybe I could down-play it a bit with his reaction to Bill and it could just be that his face is somehow injured from the blows he took at capture? Hmm... I will definitely give this some thought, and I know I will eventually make some edits to correct (or at least, smooth over) this faux pas. Thanks so much for pointing it out. Until I make some corrections, you will have to suspend your disbelief, as my Ron will continue to be quite verbose for the rest of this story. :) (What pain he must be in!) Ha! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing, Carole! I was really tickled to see you here.

ha ha ha ha. Of course it helps that this really is my favourite song at Kareoke nights, but this is just very funny.
Nicely put together - poor Ron.

Author's Response:

Hello Equinox Chick,

It is a great Karaoke song, isn't it? That's one of the reasons I used it instead of a different one. Poor Ron and his fear of spiders! He's such a great character!

Thanks for R & R-ing. I'm thrilled you had a good giggle over it!

Kara's Aunty :)

Hello, Andi. Well, as you always review my stories and chapters, I thought I should return the favour. Have to say, I really like the idea for this fic, and I do hope you continue with it. I'd love a chapter featuring a listener. Lee and Kingsley come through very nicely and despite the fact that there are no dialogue tags, I managed to follow the different voices very well.

I have a few nitpicks (sorry)

We anguish this calamity Hmm, I'm not sure you can 'anguish' something. I get what you're saying, but I think anguish is a noun, and using it as a verb just strikes me as a bit odd.

We advise you from saying it. I think this would read better as 'We advise you not to say it. It's a clearer instruction, then.

Other kinds of magical creatures such as centaurs or the werewolves, who are not supporting the winner of the Big Bully Award, are also having great difficulties with ‘the New World’. Right, because of the phrasing it sounds as if all the werewolves and centaurs are against Voldemort. We know that the majority of werewolves are on Voldy's side. I think you should change it to 'some werewolves' or 'those werewolves.'

However, they're minor points, and didn't detract from the story or the flow. Update - Please! ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thank you for the review, and the nitpicks! - how I love them. :P I'll change them right now. Hm. I guess I should work on the next chapter some more... it'll be up soon. I hope. Thanks again!

"Well, there's not enough of me in this story - obviously. And why did you get that clumsy cousin of mune to drop Butterbeer in my lap -- not wuite the look for the stylish wizard about town."

"Sirius, Leave Terri's story alone. She's written very nicely about my first meeting with Remus. Hmmm, why did you have to introduce me as Nymphadora, I just know he's going to use that whenever he's cross with me now."

"Cross with you, Dora. Never."

Ahh, Terri. Lovely story. I like a bit of Sirius when he's not gloomy. He wasn't thoroughly miserable the whole time (we see that at Christmas with Harry) and Tonks can cheer anyone up. I do like that you've referenced his 'black' side by showing hsi temper and also how annoyed he is not being able to be Snuffles again. Great moment, and believable - your characteristion is wonderful, as usual. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Carole,

Thank you so much for your review. Sirius, shhh, let me thank Carole first, after all, she did do the typing... Anyway, dear, you always make me smile. I'm glad you think I captured their meeting right, that means a lot to me coming from you. As for the "other" commentators...

Sirius, you have plenty of stories just about you, let Remus have one.

Tonks, sorry dear, but that was Sirius' doing introducing you that way.

Carole, thanks again hon. Keep a watch out for more of this story. Terri

This is a lovely poem, Natalie. The sense of loss from Snape is heartfelt, but it ends on a note of hope because the love he felt for Lily (and still feels) is what warms him and sets him apart from the other DE's.

Critiquing the poem as a piece is always harder, I think, than critiquing prose because the style is that much more individual. However, here goes... I enjoyed the start of the poem, yet wasn't quite sure of the flow. The second line seems a bit too syllable heavy, but I guess on re-reading that's fixed by me stressing 'am' rather than always. *forgive this stream of consciousness review* I love the second verse especially the 'old like ages' line. It really evokes the lonliness of the man. The third verse is a bit discordant, to be honest. It seems to overstate exactly what happened between them. I'm not totally sure how I'd have written it, and actually it matters very little because the fourth verse is just wonderful. 'niche in my mind' 'void in my heart' I get the very real sense that Snape tries not to dwell daily on Lily but it must have been very hard for him not to - especially when Harry was at Hogwarts. Finally in that last verse, you've left another slightly discordant note - but this one I really like. With the addition of the question mark after 'always' - you seem to be suggesting that he does occasionally doubt his love for Lily. This is quite brilliant, because there must have been times when his feelings receeded - otherwise he would never have been able to conduct a normal life. However, as soon as he needs to cast a Patronus, Lily is there before him.

Brilliant! You should write more poetry, Natalie, and get yourself a thread in Poetry anyone. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Aaack! I am replying after months, but I decided to do it now. :D



To tell you the not-so-pretty truth, I suck at poetry. :( And that must be why the third verse was discordant. hee hee. I mean, I have no sense of rhyme or metric or all those things, and I don't even read out my poems aloud. So...that was it. The rare moments when I do write poems, I do them in free verse.



But thanks for the lovely review and the encouragements. :D



Natalie.

Ahh, that was fun. You certainly have a talent for pranks, Gina. I remember your April Fool's Challenge entry.

I did like your characterisation of Sirius and James. Both convinced they were hilarious, but Sirius being big enough to accept the joke was glorious. The best, I think, was Snape because you resisted the urge to make him 'snivel' at them. He got revenge in a wonderful way and proved he was better at magic than them.

I liked Lily's appearance and her unique carving on James' bum. It was great to see her as a real person and not a humourless bat in a rage at James all the time. After all, James wouldn't have fancied siomeone with no sense of humour. I think I was smiling throughout the story. Lots of fun ... ~Carole~

Author's Response: A talent for pranks? Well, maybe for writing them since I can't say I pulled very many myself, lol. Thanks, though! And thank you for reading this, I'm glad it made you smile. And I really appreciate your positive comments because I know you are a Marauder fan. Thanks again! ~Gina :)